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"There can be no more separate sleeping. You're married, not roommates. You can wait to have intercourse, but I'm going to insist you sleep in the same bed. It helps build a bond."
"Are you serious? That's going to be very awkward," I protest.
"I understand, but that's part of the experiment."
"Fine. I'll talk to him about it tonight."
She looks over her notes and then back up at the camera. "How about living arrangements?"
"Right now we are staying in his grandmother's guesthouse. He contacted a Realtor. He wants to actually buy a house."
"That's a positive step, and it shows he is taking this seriously. I can tell you're stressed out, Asia. Just try to relax and let things happen, okay? This is all part of the process. We really didn't expect the couples to fall in love at first sight."
Letting out a deep breath, I nod. "You're right. It's just harder than we thought."
"Stay positive—and open-minded. Remember to write in your journal, and we'll chat next week. If you're feeling extra stressed, you can text or call me at any time. I don't want you to feel alone or be too overwhelmed, but I also want you to talk to him about your feelings as much as possible."
"Okay, I'll do my best. Should I send him in?"
"Yes."
I leave the guest room to find him sitting on the couch having a stare-off with Princess Pixie, who's perched on the arm of the couch, holding her own.
"You can't win," I tell him. "Just give up now."
"I'll break this cat. I'm king of the castle now. That makes me above her."
"Tell yourself what you want, oh great one. Dr. Hollister is ready for you."
Breaking his stare from the cat, he turns to me. "How did it go?"
"Okay, I guess. She didn't say much. She's insisting we sleep together immediately."
He claps his hands together. "Woo-hoo. Go put something sexy on."
"Sleep, Talon. As in, in the same bed. Not sex."
He rises and scowls at me. "What the fuck? Don't tease me like that, baby. My dick can't take this shit."
"It's only been two days. Your dick will be fine. You better go before she disconnects."
I have a moment of inner debate as he disappears down the hall and closes the door, and Good Asia loses. I tiptoe down the hall and press my ear against the door. So very wrong.
"…what the fuck you idiots were thinking. Not sure how you expect us to take this thing seriously when you purposely set us up to fail."
I can't hear Dr. Hollister at all, but his voice is pretty loud and clear.
"…Well, yeah, I get that. But she's just not my type. She's too fucking cute. It's like fucking a puppy."
My heart plummets practically to my feet. Fucking a puppy? That's how he thinks of me? Not only is that a huge insult but pretty damned twisted.
His voice continues. "…Okay, not a puppy, but you get what I'm saying. She doesn't have the bang factor I'm used to."
Bang factor?
"…She's sorta sweet, and I like how creative she is. Did you set us up because I have money? I don't mind getting her out of the ghetto, but I'm feeling a little like that's the reason you stuck us together. I wanted a wife, not a charity case."
I pull away from the door and slowly and quietly make my way back to the living room, my eyes and chest stinging from that unexpected blow. A charity case. That's even worse than the puppy comment.
Could that be true? Is that the only reason they put us together? I wonder if Kat somehow had something to do with this and convinced Dr. Hollister to set me up with the richest guy in the program. Dr. Hollister is her boss, after all. I'm sure she could have thrown her opinion in there. And, from an experiment standpoint, how interesting would it be to see the plain, poor girl matched up with the sexy, hot, megarich rock star?
Cradling Pixie, I wander out to the screened porch and settle into one of the blue-cushioned chairs. This all feels so wrong. My whole reason for participating in this crazy experiment was to find someone to love me, someone who wouldn't hurt me. To find someone to share the rest of my life with. I never expected to be insulted and have my soul torn apart, or to have my lifestyle sliced and diced and judged by someone who was born into a famous family and has loads of talent.
"There you are." His booted feet appear on the floor in front of me, but I can't look up at him because I don't want him to see how hurt I am. "What's wrong?" he asks.
"Oh, not much. I'm just sitting here being a puppyfuck charity case with zero bang factor."
Sarcasm has always been something I seem to have no control over, and today is no exception. When I'm hurt, it’s my first choice as a self-defense weapon.
Chapter 13
Talon
Shit.
"You were listening to my conversation?" I demand, keeping my voice low so Gram doesn't hear me. The last thing I need is her over here playing referee or calling Asher or my mom here to counsel us.
"Yes." She leans her chin against the top of the cat’s head, and the cat in turn rubs up against her neck. "I know I shouldn't have been, and it was really immature of me. But I wanted to hear what you said about me. I just wasn't expecting to hear all that."
Her head finally rises, and I'm looking into watery, purple gems that literally stop my heart for a few seconds.
I've never hurt anyone before—or made a girl cry. Well, not since in third grade when I refused to sit next to Jenny Mallow on the school bus. But since then—nope. I've never been through a messy breakup or broken a girl's heart, because I've never been with a chick who cared about anything other than sleeping with a guy in a band.
But just one day after my wedding, I've already made my wife cry.
Marriage isn't easy.
It's a whole lot of fucked up.
It's a fucking melting pot of emotions.
And a ton of damage control.
How the hell do people do this for twenty-five years or more?
"I didn't mean it."
"Yes, you did."
"I didn't."
"You did."
> "No, I didn't." This convo is very reminiscent of how I fight with my little sister, and methinks that cannot be good on any level.
"You did. Be honest," she says.
I kneel down on the floor in front of her chair so I'm not towering over her. "Okay, I sorta meant it, but not as bad as it sounded. I really do think you're cute. I'm sarcastic, just like you. It's how I express myself."
"I get that. I'm not after your money, Talon. I was doing just fine. If they put us together because you have money, then I'm sorry, but I don't want to be with someone who feels sorry for me."
"I don't feel sorry for you, Aze. But I do feel bad that I obviously hurt your feelings, which I never meant to do."
Her eyes drift from mine to stare out into the yard. "It's my own fault for eavesdropping. I'm sorry I did that; it was wrong."
"Don't apologize to me. I'm the asshole here, not you."
She wipes her finger beneath her eye, smearing her eyeliner in the process. "You're not an asshole. You're entitled to your own thoughts. I'm sorry I don't have the bang factor, or whatever you called it."
"Come on… that's just shit guys say when we talk about women."
"Either way, I'm pretty certain I'm never gonna live up to that. So I'm not sure where that leaves me."
"Well…" I begin, struggling for some kind of right words. "Maybe that's a good thing. The bang factor is just like wham-bam." I reach out and pet Pixie, my fingers lightly brushing over Asia's hand that is resting on the cat's back. "Something tells me you've got way more to offer than just something to bust a nut in."
Her eyes widen and her lip curls up a little bit. "Bust a nut?" The words sound so much worse coming out of her mouth.
"I guess I'm not making this any better, am I?"
"I can see that you're trying, so at least the effort is there, but your choice of words leaves a little bit to be desired."
"I was trying to say I think you'd be more than just a quick fuck."
As she shakes her head slowly from side to side, an awkward smile creeps across her face. "Let's quit while we're ahead. I think I get what you're trying to say."
