“I just wanted to take a moment to thank you all for coming tonight,” he says, his voice echoing off the side of the building. “A lot of people don’t know the story about how I proposed to Mina, and I guess now’s the best time to tell everyone how it went down.
“Mina turned me down.”
Laughter fills the air at the same time Mina takes Josh’s hand and places a comforting kiss on the back of his hand.
“She told me, ‘Ask me again when you mean it.’ I guess asking in a spur of the moment while we were covered in strawberry smoothies after a mishap with my blender didn’t help. But the thing that Mina didn’t know was, I knew I wanted to marry her by our second date. We were sharing a hazelnut waffle at Marie’s, and I noticed how she saved the last piece for me. And she listened to all of my basketball stories like I was talking to her about Ryan Gosling.”
Another round of laughter.
“Ryan doesn’t hold a candle to you, baby,” she coos in his direction.
“Say that again when you’re watchingLa La Land.” He lets the laughter die down before adding, “Mina is my soulmate in every way possible. I would choose her in every lifetime, and I can’t wait to live the rest of this one so we can continue on in the next.” Josh raises his glass at the same time as everyone else, and Mina stands to kiss him. A round of claps and cheers fill the air, and I catch Teeny’s eyes from across the table.
It suddenly feels like this is the next lifetime Josh was talking about. After having failed so miserably at the first, I’ve landed right in front of this one. This second lifetime where I learned from my mistakes. One where I choose Teeny over and over again, and we get to see this play out between us. And I can’t even begin to imagine a lifetime where I don’t choose Teeny.
* * *
“I can’t believe I never thought to learn how to tie a bow tie.”
I chuckle, my focus zoned in on Josh’s Adam’s apple where I’m working the knot through the loop to make sure it’s even and secure. “I don’t think very many people know how to tie a bow tie.”
“You do,” Josh points out.
“Yeah, well, I’ve been to my fair share of events and shit, so.” He scoffs just as I finish adjusting the ends of the bow tie and give his shoulder a pat. “Look at that. Now you look like you belong on the top of a cake.”
“Thanks.”
He turns, looking at the mirror placed strategically so we’re sitting under the perfect lighting for this time of day. Just outside the window veiled with sheer curtains, lies the expansive view of the coastal vineyard where Josh and Mina are having their wedding. Myself, Josh, James, and Andrew have been confined to this room until we’re given the go-ahead for the ceremony, and with the antsiness of the bride and groom’s big day, we’re all eager to get things going.
“You ready?” I ask, smoothing a hand over my jacket to dust off any residual dust after running a lint roller over pressed lapels.
“Yep.” Josh leads the way, all of us following at his heels as he exits the room and maneuvers down hallways to the foyer leading outside.
We’re ushered to a canopy set up for the wedding party where we get a glimpse of the guests waiting patiently for the ceremony to begin. I have no idea where Teeny is, though she’s most likely with Mina and the rest of the bridesmaids. And even though she has her own duties as a member of the wedding party, I can’t help but search for her, hoping to get a glimpse of her before we stand on either side of the altar.
Before I can track her down, the processional music starts. It begins with the brighter chords of a violin, followed by the lower tenor of a cello. We step out, following Josh with his mom’s arm hooked through the crook of his right arm with his dad matching his steps to his left. I trail last with Andrew and James ahead of me, and we’re finally waiting for the rest of the wedding party to enter.
I know the star of the evening is the bride. With her extravagant dress and meticulously planned out hair and makeup, it’s a title every bride deserves. But right now, all I can think of is Teeny. She steps out behind the rest of the bridesmaids in her stunning green dress, and she looks achingly beautiful. She smiles at someone in the crowd, adding a small wave of recognition, and something tugs at my chest. It feels like my past. Like a thread where one end started twenty years ago and the other end is wrapped around my heart, reminding me of what we had. The nights spent huddled under the covers in my room, wishing for time to stand still so she wouldn’t have to leave me. The small moments in the hallways or in class where we glanced at each other, like we were exchanging a secret. And all those times I found myself with Teeny holding me down, letting me know I was so much more than the fear and trepidation that bundled my life into what it used to be. I’m not whole without her. I was broken pieces before her, all those fragments being swept along with the barely there will to focus on my future. She put me back together. And I broke us up, making those shattered pieces irreparable. Until now. Somehow, I’m learning how to glue myself back together.
The sounds of the wedding sound muffled, my attention solely focused on Teeny. She stands at the other side of the altar where my view of her is obscured by the ceremony at hand. Next thing I know, Josh is dipping Mina in a dramatic kiss with the cheer and laughter spurring on a longer-than-necessary kiss.
We make our exit out of the ceremony, the bridesmaids and groomsmen linking arms to walk the same path of the aisle, and I realize that I’m paired up with Teeny.
“Hi.”
“Hi,” she responds softly. She smiles at me before hooking her hand over my arm, and all I want to do is veer her away from all the people just to get a moment alone with her. I want to ask her about her day, what she had for breakfast, and how she spent her morning getting ready. I want to take her on a long walk along the vineyard, searching for secluded corners where I can just listen to her talk.
We walk while I keep my eyes on her, ignoring the people slowly filing out of the rows of folding chairs, and once we’re at the end of the aisle, it’s a flurry of pictures. We’re guided away from the guests and enticing cocktail hour, toward the scenic area of the vineyard where we spend the next hour posing for pictures.
“You look beautiful,” I whisper to Teeny, my hand gently resting on her lower back as we pose for what feels like the hundredth time.
“Thank you,” she responds, her words coming out through a gritted smile.
I let my thumb smooth over the soft material of her dress, not realizing I’m doing it until it’s already done, and Teeny looks up at me. “You don’t look too bad yourself.”
I smirk. “I tried.”
She smooths her hand over my jacket, adjusting the boutonniere pinned to the lapel, and we look at each other. Our gazes lock and smiles widen, and just as I dip my head to tell her green is definitely her color, we’re interrupted by an overly exaggerated “ahem.” Teeny and I turn our heads to the photographer, who’s giving us an impatient look like that of a parent who’s had to repeat themselves more than once to their child.
