Our conversation is cut short as people start to take their seats. Josh and Mina settle in somewhere in the center, where they can spread their attention throughout the table, along with the other bridesmaids. Andrew returns with my chardonnay and sits in the empty seat next to James, leaving the seat to my right empty.
Dinner starts, introductions are made. The one other bridesmaid is Mina’s cousin, who seems pretty friendly and normal. The maid of honor, Mina’s best friend from college, is the only one missing. She’s set to arrive a few days before the wedding from New York City.
It isn’t rare or uncustomary for my siblings and I to come together for dinner like this. And it isn’t even always for things like wedding celebrations or birthdays or anniversaries. It can even be for something as menial as an impromptu weekend barbeque or beach day with the kids. But the one glaring sore thumb we can’t seem to ignore is the fact that my husband isn’t here. There’s no excuse of a sickly baby at home to take care of. The continuous mentions of work and long hours at the office are wearing thin. I could almost feel it on the tips of everyone’s tongues. Where’s Leo?
My entire body feels worn, too tired from making up excuses.
“He’s working late.”
“He had a meeting with some clients that’s taking longer than he thought.”
“This case he’s working on is taking up a lot of his time.”
After all these years, filled with lies and months and months of multiple “momentary lapses of judgment,” all I want to do now is throw in the towel.
“Hey, is Leo coming?” Andrew asks, nodding his head to the empty seat, as if he’s reading my damn mind. “He still owes me a hundred bucks from our last round of golf. Or did he not tell you how badly I kicked his ass last month?”
I catch James glancing at me, a solemn look of concern and discretion keeping him from saying anything. “No, he’s…at home,” I finally answer, my words spoken in a whisper through my lie.
“How about you stop placing bets every time we hit the golf course,” James cuts in, flicking Andrew’s fork so it loudly clinks against his small bread plate.
The sounds of James and Andrew bickering fade into muffled words of, “You’re just jealous of my stroke count.” I drown out the noise with the light drum of my fingers against the clothed table. My hands start to feel clammy, and the room starts to feel like it’s closing in on me. I stand from my seat, turning to James and pointing my finger toward the much more crowded dining area. He nods, accepting my signal to excuse myself to the little girls’ room, and I walk the narrow walkway.
My phone buzzes in my hand, and when I look at the screen, I see an alert for a new text message from Leo.
Leo
I came home to get a few things and you weren’t here. I was hoping to talk to you.
My entire body sags and I feel like what little energy I had left dissolves into defeat. What does he expect? That he could cheat on me, ruin our marriage after fifteen years, and simply hope I’d move on from it? Forgive him? How are we supposed to move on from this?
I toss my phone into my bag, hoping it’ll get lost in there where I won’t be disturbed by it for the rest of the night, and continue my way toward the ladies’ room. I didn’t need to pee or do anything bathroom related but I needed some air or…something to take my mind off Leo’s barrage of messages.
I need to talk to you.
I’m sorry.
Please let me come back home.
“Oof!”
A large body, one clad in a dark navy suit and brown oxfords, crashes into me. I stumble a step back, slapping my hand against the nearest wall for support.
“Ohmigod,” I say with a gasp. “I’m so sor—” I pause, looking at the dark eyes of the stranger peering down at me with a sharp jawline and a slightly crooked nose. Only, it’s no stranger. Far from it.
Everett.
“Teeny.”
“Wh-what.” I feel disoriented. My knees buckle and the bottom pit of my stomach feels like it weighs two tons. Everything around me feels like it’s spinning. Twisting and turning on a tilted axis like a spinning globe.
I turn away from the direction of the bathroom I had no real business going to in the first place. From the rest of the wedding party, from my past in the form of the biggest heartbreak of my life. A gust of fresh air hits me in my face when I exit the restaurant and I rush to my car, not bothering to tell my brothers I’m leaving when I feel a warm hand grip my elbow.
“Teeny, wait.”
Everett was always able to catch up to me. With his long legs and agility on and off the basketball court, there wasn’t a place I could go to outrun him. And twenty years ago, I never wanted to. I always wanted him to come find me. To make things right, to fix whatever wrong had happened between us. Until I waited and he never came.
I tug my arm from his grip, ignoring his protest, as my heels continue to click against the sidewalk.
