“Anytime. Anytime I can,” she amended.
This would be the only time. We held our gazes for a heartbeat. I nodded and took off, leaving my girls behind.
June
Bethany hugged her guitar. “I can’t believe this is our last lesson.”
“Do we have to give the guitars back?” Hannah asked. She wrapped her arms around the body of her instrument like her sister.
“I’ll have to talk to your dad. I can’t fit these into my car for the drive back, and I doubt my sister wants to hang on to them.” I hadn’t even checked. I’d bought these guitars for the girls, and I wanted them to stay with the girls. Rhys probably wouldn’t mind. When I’d first shown up with them, yes. But not now.
“What are you going to play for the fundraiser?” Bethany put her guitar aside and curled her legs under her on the couch.
“Probably some of my more popular songs. What do you want to hear?”
“ ‘That Boy,’ ” Bethany said instantly.
“And ‘Emerald Rain.’ You’re jealous of Mommy in that one,” Hannah said.
Alarm detonated inside my rib cage. How’d they know? “Where’d you hear that?”
Bethany elbowed her sister in the ribs. “Hannah.”
I could blow it off, but someone had talked to them about the lyrics of that song and clued them in.
“We talked to Mommy about you,” Bethany said, guilt making her shoulders drop and her lower lip puff out. “I’m sorry.”
All my tension melted away. They didn’t need to apologize. I knew my lyrics might affect the real people who inspired them, but the younger me who’d written them hadn’t thought I’d have to face a reckoning. I hadn’t been insulting to Kirstin. I’d been as embarrassed about my jealousy as I was devastated that I had thought I was losing Rhys forever.
“Don’t be. She’s your mom. Of course you’d talk with her.” If I’d been home to talk to Mama more, I might not have written a song about how Rhys’s marriage made me feel. “Yes, I was very envious that your mom got to marry your dad. I was sad it didn’t work out for me and him.” Two pairs of big eyes blinked at me, so I continued. “I was also happy for him though.” I wasn’t beneath lying a little bit. None of my feelings had been happiness. “And without your mom and your dad, there wouldn’t be Bethany and Hannah, and I happen to think Bethany and Hannah are pretty cool, and I’m glad they’re around.”
They both grinned. Cool relief eased the knotsaround my shoulders. Rhys didn’t need to return to two confused girls who were worried they’d insulted a rising country star or were betraying their mother.
“When are you coming back?” Hannah asked.
“I hope I can return after Summer has her baby.” The pressure in my skull increased with my heart rate. Would I be able to see my newest niece or nephew? Would Rhys avoid me? Would he let me say hi to the girls or cut me off entirely?
I would return to sneaking in and out of town so I could see my family in peace. Every time I crossed city limits, would I hope my car broke down until I snapped and sabotaged it myself?
Then Lane would know. He’d tell everyone, and they’d all know that I was hopelessly in love with Rhys and I wanted to be with him.
But everyone probably already knew that. Just like we all knew it didn’t matter.
“Junie?” Bethany asked, her eyes narrowing. “Are you okay?”
I snapped out of my head. “Yes. Yes, I’m fine. What’d you ask?” DidIneed an emergency trip to the vet? Was it the leftovers? I rubbed the center of my chest and inhaled a slow breath.
“When’s she having her baby?” Hannah asked again.
I let out a long breath. “September sometime. But once the album is ready to release, I’ll have to do promotional stuff like interviews and appearances, then the tour will start.”
“Where will you go?” Hannah leaned forward like I was getting to the climax of a story.
Fitting. Embarking on the tour would be the climax. Everything afterward would be the denouement. Biggerand longer tours. Maybe even a Las Vegas residency where I could put down roots for a little bit.
I didn’t want to live in fucking Vegas.
“All over,” I finally answered. “Usually, the shows for tours like these are in the bigger cities of each state.”
