“Yes, well, I did have the Carsons, and they did show me what a family looked like. And then they left me too.” The tears start up again, but I manage to keep them silent.
“I’m not going to lie, that one definitely surprised me a bit. I always thought you and Seth had what it took to be together in the long run.”
Yeah. Me too. “He’s here. In LA, I mean. Seth moved to LA.” I didn’t intend to share that, but once the words are out, I hold my breath for her reaction. As if she can be the one to tell me what to do despite barely knowing a thing about my life.
“Oh?” I can almost see the smile on her face. “Well then maybe you two have what it takes after all.”
“You don’t think I need to focus on me? Focus on being single and standing on my own two feet?” I don’t know why her opinion on the subject suddenly matters, but it does.
“Oh, honey, you’ve been standing on your own two feet for almost your entire life.”
It’s a simple statement, but the truth of it punches me in the gut. She’s right. I’ve been taking care of myself for a really long time, and whatever my relationship status is doesn’t change that fact. I had to learn how to fend for myself and how to be alone long before I ever sought constant companionship from whoever was willing to hand it to me.
We sit in the silence for a couple of minutes.
“I should go, I have a meeting with the contractors soon.” And just like that, everything goes back to the way it always was.
“Okay. I guess I’ll talk to you later.”
“Lana, I hope you know that you can call me anytime. I will always pick up for you. And I have always, and will always, love you.”
“Thanks, Mom. I love you too.”
“I’ll call you soon.” The phone clicks and the other end goes silent.
And I open my laptop and I write.
29
Feel free to bring a buffer date with you when you know you’re going to see your ex at a party, but please don’t try that fake-dating trope. It only works in romance novels.
—Lana Parker, “How to Survive That First Run-in with Your Ex”
Natasha sends me an email asking me to come into the office the day I return from San Clemente. The fact that she’s emailing instead of texting is alarming enough on its own, but when I knock on her office door and find Seth already sitting in front of her desk, I almost pass out.
Natasha greets me with what she probably thinks is a warm smile but borders on a grimace. “There she is! Come on in and have a seat.”
It takes a second for my brain to kick in and for my feet to move. I don’t look at Seth as I perch myself on the edge of one of Natasha’s blue velvet chairs, positioning myself as far away from him as possible. I don’t need to look at him to feel the surge of anger and hurt radiating from him. “What’s going on?”
Natasha clasps her hands together and looks at us both as if she’s the proud parent and we’re her all-star children. It’s a look that would’ve once made me glow with pride. Now it makes my stomach turn.
“So. As you know, our competition comes to an end next week, and it’s perfect timing. TheChroniclewants to host a small party to celebrate the acquisition. They’re really pleased with how this little experiment has paid off. I’m planning on making a short speech, during which I’ll introduce the two of you, give a recap of the standings, and officially announce the kickoff of the reader vote.”
Seth shifts in his seat, the subtle creak the only sound in the room.
“Does this mean you’ll need us to be at the party?” I finally ask when the silence becomes too thick.
“Yes, well, of course I need you there.” She looks back and forth between us, as if she is just now picking up on the fact that we haven’t so much as glanced at each other. “But more than that, I want you two to do something special for this event, really make it something that bringsATFattention. Something to go viral.”
“Just spit it out, Natasha.” The words fly out of my mouth, and I don’t know who’s more surprised, her or me. “I mean, what is it that you want us to do?”
She shoots me a silencing look. “In conjunction with the end of the competition, I also want you to announce your relationship. That you both were able to learn and grow so much on this journey, and you finally realized at the end of all this that you were meant to be together. You’re going to be our golden couple.”
Just when I thought the silence couldn’t get any more oppressive.
“But we’re not dating... ,” I say slowly, still trying to force my brain to process what’s happening here.
Natasha waves her hand like she’s swatting a bug. “Who cares. The people don’t need to know that, they just want a happy ending to the story.”
