Stella felt like she needed three to five business days to process this information, but if her now former colleagues were about to get the boot, she didn’t have that kind of time.
“Wait, so he’s going to lay off people?” Stella said.
“He was,” Max said. “I’m not sure what he’s going to do now that I’ve taken away Sparky. Plus, with your article going viral, I think he may have bigger fish to fry at the moment. Nice job, by the way.”
Max had touched her knee when he said this, and that, in tandem with his words, made warmth flood through her body. She knew her essay was great, but hearing it from Max, the person she was most worried about seeing it, filled her with something she couldn’t quite find the words for.
“Thank you,” she said. Reaching forward, she took his hand in hers. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about it beforehand, but I didn’t want to be talked out of it, and I knew I had to say something. I don’t think I’ve ever been so angry in my life, honestly.”
“You don’t owe me an apology,” Max said. “You didn’t do anything wrong. Miles fucked up here.”
“Well, yeah, but he’s still your brother,” Stella said. “Have you spoken to him at all today?”
Max nodded. “He overheard me talking to Rashid about you. He knows we’re…seeing each other.”
“What?”
Stella dropped his hand and stood. She needed to pace for this conversation.
“What did he say?” Stella asked. “I mean, what does this mean, now that he knows?”
“Nothing, I don’t think,” Max said carefully. “You no longer work for him. My company is no longer in business with him. Now all this means is that my brother knows I’m seeing someone.”
“Okay, but Max,” Stella said, rubbing her temples. “You can’t tell me he was just fine with it. I’m sure he hates my guts now.”
Max sighed. “He may have said something along the lines of he’d never forgive me and I lost a brother or something like that.”
“Max—”
Max stood, putting his hands on Stella’s shoulders to hold her in place while he met her eyes.
“Stella, I’m not worried about Miles,” Max said. “He’ll come around. All I care about right now is you.”
Stella inhaled sharply, breaking from Max’s grasp to take a step back.
“But you barely know me, Max,” Stella said. “I mean, we haven’t even defined our relationship, and you’re what? Never going to speak to your brother again because of me?”
“I do know you,” Max said, reaching for her. She let him take her hands in his, and he lowered his head until she met his eyes again. “I know that you snore. I know that you love sitcoms even when they do problematic shit like make Winston a cop.”
“He should’ve been a mailman,” she muttered.
Max laughed. “Exactly. And I know that your favorite color is pink and that you love to cuddle. I know that you love yourfriends and your parents. I know that you went to DC for school but came back here because this is home, just like I did. And I know that I love you. So if you want me to define this relationship, then that’s the definition for me. I want a relationship with you. I want you in my bed, waking up next to me in my clothes. I want to share a pizza with you. I want to laugh with you. I want to read every single thing you write. I want you.”
If Stella’s brain was short-circuiting before, it was nearly out of commission now. There was so much said and yet all she could hear were those three words on a loop in her head.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
“Stella?” Max squeezed her hands gently, and she shook her head. Right, she should say something. Except she didn’t know what to say. She knew she liked Max a lot, more than a lot, really, if she was being honest. Butlovewas such a big word, one she’d never said before, not in this context. How was she supposed to know if that was what she was feeling or if everything that’d occurred over the past day was messing with her emotions?
And if she didn’t love him, could she really let him choose her over his own brother? That question was easy at least. She knew she couldn’t.
“I think we should take a day to think about things,” Stella said, moving back from him.
The hurt on his face was a look Stella was sure she would never forget, but she held firm.
