* * *
MILO
My body goes up in flames at her touch, and I grip the edges of my chair to keep from dropping to my knees at her feet, the wood creaking under the strain. My insecurities and doubt hurt her, and I’m gutted by the thought.
That’s the last thing that I wanted.
Reaching up, I grip her wrist, afraid she’ll pull away both physically and mentally. “I love that you’re so sure of yourself. I am not. I’ve waited my lifetime for a woman like you, and I’m terrified of fucking things up. I trust you with my life, I just—”
“Don’t think you’re good enough,” Stanton finishes for me when I can’t voice my worst fears.
Jolie whirls and glares at Stanton like she would personally pound him to a pulp for just saying what I was thinking. Her dainty fangs are on full display, and my cock predictably stands to attention. When she takes a threatening step toward Stanton, I tighten my grip on her wrists.
“He’s right.” My voice cracks in shame, and I drop my gaze, unable to meet her eyes when she realizes the truth.
“No, it’s you who are wrong,” Stanton interrupts, and my attention swings to him in shock. He drums his fingers against the table, a scowl on his face. “You are the only one who sees yourself as unworthy. I saw you just after you were turned. You were nearly feral with hunger, but you didn’t give in to the darkness.
“You could’ve embraced the life of a predator, become a monster like your creator wanted, but you fought it. You went through hell and managed to retain your humanity.”
“My humanity?” I rip myself away from Jolie, my fangs descending with a snick. I shoot to my feet and slam my hands on the table, and I don’t need a mirror to know my eyes have gone dark. “Do I look human to you? I killed people. I did things to them that were unspeakable. I—”
Stanton’s booming laugh startles me so badly that I break off my tirade. My rage blinks off, and I drop back down into my chair, suddenly feeling hollow. Stanton slowly pours a cup of blood, and I’m almost hypnotized by the dark liquid splashing into the goblet.
The decanter clicks when he sets it on the table, then he pushes the cup toward me. “You feel remorse, which is something most vampires don’t feel, especially when they’re first turned. It’s the reason why vampires have so many rules about how and when a person can be changed.
“Fledglings often get caught up in bloodlust and have to be monitored closely. You were different. You only fed when forced. Even now, you walk a thin line between starving yourself and only drinking blood from a bag. I admire your willpower. It’s what caught my attention in the first place. It’s why I spared you from the culling and asked you to join my team.”
I sit up straighter in my chair at his praise, so stunned, I can do nothing but gawk at the ancient vampire. “I-I had no idea you felt that way.”
Jolie’s hand rests on my shoulder, giving it a comforting squeeze, and I lean down and brush my cheek against the back of her hand. His absolute faith in me banishes some of my insecurities, and I look back at my life through his eyes.
While it doesn’t automatically cure my inadequacies, I do feel a little more worthy to be called Jolie’s mate. Despite all my fears and worries, I realize she needs someone like me to keep her from being swallowed by darkness.
I can drag her back from the edge of madness, because I’ve done it.
“But you’re not going to be any use to her if you don’t get your head out of your ass,” Stanton states with a hard twist to his lips.
It’s only when his gaze drops toward the glass of blood before me that I understand.
“While I appreciate your reluctance to drink fresh blood and commend you for your restraint, you are now her mate,” he says bluntly, tossing his napkin on the table. “You don’t get to stand on your principles anymore, not whenherlife rests in your hands.”
Jolie shuffles closer and wraps her other arm around my upper shoulders in a backward hug, as if trying to protect me. She practically vibrates with rage, and I reach up and squeeze her arm before she can unleash her wrath.
“I understand.” I don’t even hesitate to reach for the goblet of blood.
Before I can lift it from the table, Jolie reaches forward and slams her hand over the top, then glares at us both. “Well, I don’t. If he doesn’t want to drink blood, I’m not going to allow you to bully him into it.”
“He’s not pressuring me,” I tell her, my heart warming at her protectiveness. I know she sees me as someone who needs to be coddled, and maybe she’s not wrong in some ways. But Jolie is my mate, and I will do whatever is needed to keep her safe. “If the choice is drinking blood and having you feed from me, I will gladly consume all the blood that you need.”
My cock hardens at the thought of having her dainty fangs sinking into my flesh. I shiver as I remember the bite of pain, then the feeling of euphoria spreading through my veins.
It’s a craving I can’t live without.
As if reading my mind, her cheeks flush a delicate pink, and my cock hardens further, the fucker trying to escape my pants. It’s such a strange sensation that I almost glance down at it in wonder.
After being changed, I never expected to lust after a woman again.
I feel doubly blessed that she claimed me for her own.
