“Thanks, Jace.” It’s on the tip of my tongue to tell him I’ve got an idea that will make sure he’s taken care of after I’m off the circuit, but that only comes into play if I’m able to work things out with Lennon, so I keep that to myself. So I force myself to let him go. He gives me a quick nod before ducking out of the trailer, and I search for the earliest flight I can get.
Chapter twenty-five
Lennon
The tingle starts at the base of my spine, a tiny prickle of awareness that stretches slowly upward until it reaches my neck, my shoulders, its fingers curling around me until I’m engulfed in its heated palm.
I know without having to look that I’m being watched, but instead of a warm flutter a cold shiver courses through me.This is wrong. I turn, spotting Axel’s dad at the far end of the bar.
His eyes are locked on me, cold and calculating, leaving no doubt that the version of him I saw a few weeks ago was a show for Axel’s benefit.
Pasting a blank expression on my face, I approach as if he’s any other customer. “What can I get you?”
“Coors Light. And my son.”
“Can’t help with the second one.” His beady gaze watches me carefully as I put a beer in front of him.
“Bullshit. I seen you with him on TV at his event.” He jerks his head toward the screen as if I can find the proof of his words on it. “You two are together.”
“Were,” I correct. “We aren’t anymore.”
“I don’t buy that boy, and even if I did, we both know you can still get him a message if you wanted to.”
I’d like to believe that’s true, but after the way we left things I’m not so sure. That’s why I’m getting on a plane in a few hours. He can’t hang up on me if I apologize in person.
“Sorry to disappoint, but we didn’t part on the greatest of terms. I doubt I’d have any more luck reaching him than you would.” Crossing my arms, I stand my ground, waiting to see what he says next.
“Like I said boy, I don’t buy it.” He brings the glass to his lips and gulps down a large mouthful of beer without taking his eyes off me. “But if you want to stick to that story, fine. I’ll just wait here to collect what he owes me. Unless you want to settle up for him,” he sneers. “I’d actually prefer cash to those jerseys he gave me last time.”
“You were lucky to get those if I remember right.”
“He said he’d give me more.”
“No, he didn’t.” Thank goodness, Axel told me about their last encounter, so I know the bastard is lying. Not that I’d take his dad’s word about anything, it’s just easier to stay calm since I know what I’m talking about. “That beer is on the house. When you finish it, you can leave.”
“I’m not leaving until you put me in touch with my son.” His lip curls up in disgust.
“Well, that’s going to be difficult seeing as how he’s not talking to me. Like I said, you’d have better luck on your own.” I turn around to focus on my actual customers, dismissing him in the least confrontational way I can think of.
The weight of his glare bogs me down for a solid fifteen minutes before I feel it lift, telling me he’s finally gone. But the nervous rumble in the pit of my stomach lingers.What if he comes back while I’m gone and harasses my staff? Or I get caught on camera with Axel again? Should I cancel this trip?
No. It’ll be hard enough to convince Axel I deserve a second chance after the way I treated him. I couldn’t see it then—the fear of ending up like my mother was too great—but he was right. I was being selfish.
When he asked me to find a balance between our respective careers, I heardgive mine upeven though that’s not what he said. It took Blake pointing out what a solid guy Axel is for me to replay that conversation, and with time and distance I was able to see it logically instead of emotionally.
Funny, all this time I thought I wasn’t an emotional person, and it turns out I am. I just see life through the lens of fear, then do everything in my power—sometimes to my detriment—to make sure that fear doesn’t become reality.
That little realization doesn’t mean I suddenly view the world through the lens of sunshine and rainbows. I’m still terrified of the worst happening, but after taking a hard look at myself I think it’s safe to say I don’t assume the worst. That is, I don’t assume making a life with Axel will mean walking away from the one I’ve built. It’ll look different, and if different means having him to come home to—at least when he isn’t competing—I’m all for it. I’m even for joining him at some of those competitions and celebrating with him like we did a few weeks ago. I’m ready toliveinstead of merelyexist. With him. If he’ll have me.
Unfortunately, the longer I wait the harder it will be to fix things, that much I know, so canceling my trip isn't an option if I want a future with Axel. Still, I make a mental note to warn Randy about my unwanted visitor, just in case Axel’s dad makes another appearance.
A few hours later, the restaurant is silent, and I’ve done everything possible to prepare for being gone a few days. I turn offthe lights and let myself out the back door, but before I can lock up the cold chill from earlier creeps up my spine. I spin around, coming face to face with Axel’s dad.
Though he’s too pale to be in good health, his wiry frame suggests there’s still some strength in those limbs, and the feral look in his eye says he’s unhinged. That makes him unpredictable, so while I’m capable of defending myself physically, I’d rather not have to. Plus, I don’t have to look around to know I’m all alone, and that help won’t come. Crime simply doesn’t exist here, so there’s never been a reason to take safety precautions. I’ve got no alarm, no cameras, not even a miniature can of mace. If I make one mistake defending myself, I doubt anyone would even hear me scream.
Praying he’s not so drunk he can’t process reality, I try to diffuse him. “I’ll try calling. Right now.” I fish around my pocket for my phone. “I doubt he’ll answer, but I’ll try.”
My hand is steady as I select Axel’s number and put it on speaker. The line rings two, three, four times before voicemail picks up. Though I expected it, my heart sinks a little when he doesn’t answer.
