He casually lifts a shoulder. “Sometimes. Or massages.” His eyes light up. “Massages would be an excellent way to grovel.”
“Okay, you win, Frosty. I willproperlygrovel to you later. Right now, it’s Blake’s turn. Coming?” He gives me a quick nod and follows behind me as I close the distance.
Blake’s eyes grow wide when he realizes I’m heading straight for him, but other than that his expression doesn’t change. I can’t say the same for his partners, who are both watching me warily.
“Happy New Year.” I hold my left hand out to shake his, since Hayden’s fingers are intertwined with my right, and I don’t want to let themgo.
He stares at it for a second, which I think has more to do with the fact that it’s the wrong hand than because he doesn’t want to shake it, before returning the gesture.So far so good.
I tug Hayden forward so he’s standing next to me and face the music. “This is Hayden, my… What are you exactly?” I cock my head as I pretend to contemplate what to call him. “My probation officer? Jailer?”
“Let’s go with boss.” He smiles wryly as he knocks his pointy elbow into my waist.
“That doesn’t sound nearly as interesting as jailer, but fine. Hayden, this is Blake. And his partners, who I haven’t officially met, but Kane and Jace.” I point to each of them in turn.
Hayden and Kane share an awkward smile—looks like they’ve already met—and Hayden shakes Blake and Jace’s hands. No one offers to shake mine, but they’re not scowling so I’ll take it.
“So,” I stall, waiting to see if anyone else wants to speak up. No luck. “Having a good night?”Did Hayden just snort? I bet he’s enjoying this.
“Hey man, not that I’m complaining,” Blake starts, “but does this mean you know I wasn’t involved with Chase?”
It’s so hard to swallow I actually feel my Adams apple bob in my throat. “I always knew that. Well, I might’ve been drunk enough to believe it when I made the accusation, but deep down I always knew it wasn’t you. My issue was with the fact you felt you couldn't tell me your truth.” I let my gaze travel between the three of them, so he knows what I’m referring to. “But that’s my issue, not yours. I’m trying to let go of it.”
The music stops as the next song ends, and instead of starting up another one the DJ says it’s time for a special announcement. The one I’m supposed to make with my parents and Carter about what we’redoing in Chase’s name.Fuck. I’m half tempted to bolt for the door when I feel a little squeeze on my fingers.Hayden.
Turning my head to look at him, I catch him giving me a subtle nod. And a reassuring smile. I squeeze his fingers back.
“I gotta go do this thing,” I tell Blake as I jerk my head toward the stage area. “Maybe we can catch up sometime?”
“Yeah. Of course.”
Breathing a little easier, I make my way toward the front of the room, keeping a tight grip on Hayden as I go. “Wait for me here?” I ask as we get to the stage.
He nods his head yes, and I give his hand a tiny squeeze before going to join my parents on the stage.Help me, Chase.
***
I’m still upright albeit shaky when I get off the stage, our presentation going both better and worse than I expected. Listening to my parents talk about Chase was hard, although mentioning the qualities he possessed, the ones they looked for in the recipient of the donation in his name, had me close to smiling.
It’s hard to accept that the—winner I guess you call it—is worthy of anything in my brother’s name though. That has nothing to do with him and everything to do with me, but I can’t stop the feeling from creeping into my head, so as soon as I shake his hand, I haul ass back to Hayden. I feel slightly guilty about ducking out before talking to my parents—but I don’t think I can handle my mom’s tears. I’m barely holding back my own.
One look at my face and Hayden jumps into action. “What do you need?”
“Air.”
He takes my hand and leads me outside, and before I register where we’re headed, I recognize his front door, only a few buildings down from the hotel that houses the ballroom we were just in.
“I didn’t mean for you to bring me here,” I mumble as I look around, taking in the space I didn’t really bother to see last week. It’s small—employee housing isn’t designed to be spacious—but the dark cabinets and white counter in the kitchen are neat and clean, and the gray couch looks cozy.
You already know it is, asshole, since you railed him on it and ran out.I almost wince at the memory, but only because of how I treated him after. Not because I didn’t enjoy it. I can admit that now.
“Did you think we’d just stand outside in the middle of winter? I’m the same color as a snow drift right now, one wrong step and you won’t find me until the spring thaw.” He gestures to his suit. As I follow his hand, I can’t help but notice the twin peaks of his nipples straining against the fabric of his shirt. I have a sudden urge to see what I was too rushed to focus on last time, but I swallow down the urge, willing my cock to deflate from its half-hard state.
You already defiled him. Just because he doesn’t hate you for it doesn’t mean you get to do it again.
“Don’t you want to be at the party for the ball drop?” I glance at my watch. “It’s nearly midnight.”
“I’m sure Beck will forgive me if I don’t make it back.” He sets his keys on a side table and kicks off his shoes, dropping an inch in height without them.
