Now it’s my turn to be speechless. First, from the sheer volume of information he just shared that I sort of assumed would take weeks, if not months, to come out. And second, he had—has—a shot at the Olympics? No wonder Max was so infatuated with him. He’s a far better athlete than I gave him credit for, even after I learned he was somewhat famous.
For a brief moment, I feel guilty that I wasn’t nicer to him from the start, but I shake that off since nothing can be done about it now.Besides, by his own admission he liked that I didn’t coddle him, that I held him accountable no matter what.
“Lots of things seem pointless when you lose someone or something. That doesn’t mean they don’t still have value. Think of how many people you impact with your racing. Your sponsors, your fans.”
“My impact on sponsors is financial. I’m sure they’ll survive without me wearing their gear.” He’s not being argumentative, just factual. And he’s not wrong.
“What about your fans? They aren’t making money off you, they’re inspired by you. Like Max. Do you think he would’ve wanted to try snowboarding if he wasn’t your fan?”
“Maybe.” His shoulder lifts slightly under my head. “Max thinks I should race again.”
“What do you think?”
“This past week was the first time in months, maybe years, that I didn’t ride with the goal of getting down the mountain as fast as I could. Even when I was riding with Chase we were always racing to some degree. Riding with Max was just…fun.”
“Do you feel guilty about it being fun?” I finally gather the courage to look at him, propping my head on my hand so I can see his face.
“A little.” His brows draw together slightly as he watches the ceiling. “But not so much because Chase isn’t here. It’s more that I wish instead of always turning things into a race we just played around on the mountain. I think he would’ve liked that. But he raced thinking that’s what I wanted.”
“Were you always competitive like that?”
“Once we got faster than our parents, yes. Before that, we rode for fun.” His lips tug up like he wants to smile. “That was a long time ago.”
“Sounds like before you decide if you want to race again you need to remember why you started in the first place.”
“How?”
“Just go out and have fun. Ride with your friends. Don’t try to be the fastest and just see where the trail takes you.”
He turns to look at me, studying me thoughtfully. “I see why you’re in charge of things even though you aren’t very good on the mountain.”
“Why?”
“You’re good at putting things in perspective. Knowing what people need to hear so they can move forward. You make me want to try.”
Ryder cups the back of my neck and pulls me to him, resting his lips against mine in a tender kiss. It’s soft. Sweet. And makes my heart pound in my chest as a tiny tingle forms between my legs.
I rub them together, trying to chase away the desire that seems inappropriate given the intimacy of the conversation we’re having. Either Ryder misinterprets my actions, or he’s feeling a tingle of his own, because his warm, heavy hand makes its way to the inside of my thigh.
Chapter twenty-three
Ryder
This makes another thing to add to the list of new experiences—pillow talk. And second rounds.
I tend to bolt after the sex since I’ve never really known the people I hook up with. Though, sticking around isn’t as awkward as I would’ve expected it to be. Actually, it’s kind of nice, laying next to another person and admitting where my head is at. Even though I don’t have any answers, just having Hayden here to listen makes things seem less confusing.
If there are words to express how much I appreciate that I don’t know them, so I do the only thing that comes to mind. I kiss him. And when he responds to that by subtly rubbing his legs together under the covers… The urge to be inside him again grows.
Slipping my hands between his thighs, my finger finds his hole. It’s slick enough that I can easily slide my finger inside, spreading the remnants of my release along his shaft. When I make contact with his slit, a tiny gasp falls from his lips, and I use the opening to bring mytongue to his, swiping it in rhythm, matching the pace of my finger probing his slit.
The longer I tease him, the faster he rocks his hips to meet my hand, and that has my dick growing hard enough to impale him with it. But I’ve taken all the control to this point, and I know he likes it as much as I do when we go head-to-head, so I drag him on top of me to let him take over. He doesn’t disappoint.
Scooting down my body until her mouth hovers over my rigid cock, Hayden wraps a delicate fist around my length and starts pumping slowly. When his tongue darts out to swipe over his top lip, I damn near lose all control.
“Looks like you’re pretty anxious to get my cock in your mouth.”
“Actually, I’m wondering if you’ll taste like me.” He taunts me from under heavy eyelids.
