We faced off in a battle of heartache and wills. Auster moved so suddenly I gasped, unable to stop him when his hand cupped my nape, forcing our faces inches apart.
“He wanted to kill you once too,” he said, his voice a low murmur.
The beat in my chest skipped.
“Nyte never would have followed through. Not even if I’d chosen you.”
“You can’t know that. What if you could find it in yourself to forgive me like you did him?”
Maybe there was a kernel of me that pitied Auster for his thick delusion.
“You are responsible for the death of Cassia. You almost killed Zathrian. You tore out Nyte’s wings and threatened mine. You drove my own weapon through my heart with the belief I would never return. You justdruggedme knowing I’ve suffered from substance abuse at the hand of another before. You are no better than Goldfell and far fucking worse than Nyte could ever be. I will never forgive you, Auster. You’re staring at your reckoning, pleading to stop my wrath because it’s already tightening around your throat.”
His jaw worked, eyes flaring wide as if restraining himself from hurting me or himself. I feared for a second he might kiss me.
“I don’t want to keep hurting you,” he said, so quietly, like a slipped confession while he tried to maintain a ruthless front.
The drug made my thoughts swim and tangle. It made my hate and compassion blur, and I couldn’t keep fighting, not with words or magick. But I had one last lick of venom on my tongue.
“Be your best villain, Auster Nova. Because Nyte has always been his, and I will become mine to finish you.”
14Astraea
I’d never been surrounded by so many people while the world seemed to hold its breath in a mournful silence. Even if it weren’t for the starlight matter Auster had injected me with again this morning before our pre-wedding walk through the city, the people seemed so quiet.
This day should have been full of cheers and hope, a prospective marriage for the new rulers of Solanis promising a union that would uplift the nation and strengthen protection for them. Yet, instead, my eyes pricked to the occasional face weighed down in sorrow I could make out through the lace veil covering my face, paired with the starlight matter that occasionally blurred my vision.
I was free and walking, yet a prisoner of substance once more. I kept trying to reach Lightsdeath, touching it with sparks emitting from my fingertips, but I couldn’t summon enough magick to harness it fully. I thought if I let that power consume me it might expel the starlight matter, and I only hoped once I was freed from it, I wouldn’t suffer the addiction again.
With my hand looped through the arm of the man I despised, I thought of many ways I could steal a weapon from him or a nearby guard just to keep myself calm.
As we made it to the lower level of the city, mostly occupied by humans and fae, hands started to reach toward me. I extended a hand, brushing fingers with many of the people, which started to kindle a flame inside me. I retreated, only to remove my glove, and every touch of skin on skin ignited my flame higher.
Auster’s hand closed over mine on his arm and gave a warning squeeze, likely for removing my glove, which was uncustomary. I didn’t care.
Only now did the crowd’s murmurs pick up. My senses were still dulled under the drug, so I couldn’t make out their words, but occasionally I caught sad eyes lifting with hope and wonder as I met them. I captured the smiles of all ages as I kept my hand running along the supple flesh of those who hadn’t given up on me.
A warm bundle was pressed into my palm. I carefully let the deep purple cloth stretch out, and when I saw the black wings… the key and constellation proudly adorned between… I stopped walking.
Glancing back, I didn’t know who had given it to me—the new banner of the star-maiden—and I almost lifted my veil to glance deeper through the crowd. Auster pulled me closer to him before I could. The guard detail, which followed, tightened around Auster and me, and I wondered if they detected something I couldn’t or if it was because Auster saw what had been given to me.
Auster subtly snatched the banner from me. I tried reaching for it, but my movements were too sluggish.
“Drown the world in starlight!”
The yell came from deep in the crowd, a battle cry from one of the people. It caused the guards to arm themselves as what followed engulfed us all in clouds of deep purple smoke from an explosion that rumbled in my ears. It was followed by a succession of blasts, and my senses were too dull to keep up.
I became separated from Auster somehow, pushing through the crowd and coughing on the plumes I inhaled with my panicked breaths.
Pull yourself together.
I ripped off my veil and found my dress and skin smudged with purple streaks. As I shook my head, my adrenaline brought back some sharpness to my senses and I scanned the people pushing around me. Some werefightingthe celestials. Those in Auster’s uniform. My eyes started to find many bands wrapped around biceps—my banner.
I flexed my fingers,searchingfor Lightsdeath this time as the only thing that might help me.I will be in control. I won’t hurt innocents.Once again, only pinpricks reached my fingertips, but I kept plunging deeper and deeper, fighting through the numbing effects of the starlight matter.
“Protect the maiden!” That was Auster’s men shouting. They didn’t want to protect me; they wanted to capture me.
Through the crowds I searched frantically for Auster, not in concern, but with a flash of anger that didn’t want to let him get away so easily. These people rebelled because they didn’t believe his lies, and he wasn’t getting to slither away from the confrontation like a coward.
