Page 12 of It's Not PMS, It's You

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I gave him my best pouty face. “You don’t look well. Can I get you some water? Or if you’re hungry, how about a serving of crow?”

“You’re playing with fire.”

I smirked. “I’ve got a big hose and I’m sorry that’s not something you can relate to. Rescind the offer now or your life will implode before your eyes. Everyone will know who you really are. Markston. Your boss. Your wife. You have five minutes.”

His nostrils flared. “You little—”

I held up my hand. “I changed my mind. You havethreeminutes. I think you’d better get moving.” I winked. “Run along . . . like a good little boy.”

He tapped his shoe on the floor several times, thinking. Then he slammed the rest of his beer, set the bottle on the bar, and muttered a few swear words before turning and walking toward Markston.

* * *

On the flight back to San Diego, I relaxed in my seat in business class, feeling productive and content that everything in my world was back in order again. Teddy Markston had told me that our deal was back on, fewer than ten minutes after I gave Stewart the ultimatum. He even shook my hand and said he wouldn’t change his mind again and would send the signed contract tomorrow after his lawyers went over it. I didn’t bother asking what happened to the offer he had received from Stewart even though I was curious of the excuse he used to rescind it.

It didn’t matter.

I just wanted to get back home where I felt most comfortable.

Business travel did nothing for me. The only thing I enjoyed were the drinks on the flight and being able to use the wifi in business class to work and communicate with Dee while I was 35,000 feet in the air.

The announcement from the flight attendant about the descent let me know I was almost back home.

I took a deep breath and relaxed for the last part of the flight.

Fifteen minutes later, the plane pulled out of the descent and turned away from San Diego.

“What’s going on?” I mumbled to myself, looking out the window, confused.

“I have no idea,” the man next to me said.

The flight attendants were already seated, and there were no announcements, but I was starting to get worried when we circled around San Diego instead of landing.

I looked out the window again and didn’t see any smoke or a missing wing. It didn’t appear that we had any mechanical issues. And the flight was just as smooth as it was when we had left Phoenix. Maybe there was a lot of traffic on the ground at the airport and we just had to delay the landing or wait for a gate to open up.

After the plane circled around San Diego for the third time and destroyed the possibility of an on-time arrival, I was sure my assumptions were wrong.

Something was going on.

The pilot confirmed it.

“Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. A mechanical malfunction is preventing me from extending the landing gear, and that’s why you probably noticed we’ve been circling the aircraft above San Diego. I was hoping the problem would work itself out, but that hasn’t been the case. We’ll need to make a belly landing, as we call it. We don’t have any strong crosswinds and the visibility is very good. I don’t anticipate any problems. I’m going to circle around one more time to burn off a little more fuel before we land. I’ll keep you updated. Please remain seated and follow any and all instructions from the flight attendants.”

I glanced around the cabin; the worried faces of the other passengers didn’t help the uneasy feeling in my stomach.

The two flight attendants in front of me were avoiding eye contact with the passengers.

But what happened next is what really made me think this was serious: the female flight attendant looked toward the ceiling, close her eyes for a few seconds, and then made the sign of the cross.

Not good.

I turned to the guy next to me. “Please tell me a belly landing isn’t what it sounds like.”

He leaned closer and whispered. “It’sexactlywhat it sounds like. I watched one happen live on television last year during the local news. He’s going to land the plane without the wheels.”

“Without the—”

“Like a baseball player who steals second base. He goes headfirst, you know? He slides on his chest and belly to the second base bag. The metal underside of our plane is the belly.”