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‘We all have skeletons in the closet, Maya. Why don’t we just leave mine where they are?’
‘What are you so afraid of? Aren’t playwrights supposed to be bold and daring? Aren’t they interested in exploring the mistakes of the past? Isn’t that what you’re doing in the play you’re writing now?’
‘What about your father’s mistakes?’ Blaise demanded, sensing his temper rise. ‘It’s clear you’ve been pretty damaged by them. What the hell good does it do to keep on revisiting the past? Answer me that!’
Across the table, Maya’s shoulders drooped a little in an expression of defeat. ‘You’re right. I probably am damaged by what my father did—the way he lived and the way he died. I suppose I’m just trying to understand it all, really…that’s all. I’m trying to understand it so that if I have children of my own I won’t ever do what he did—put myself and my career and my so-called friends first, so much so that the children are neglected and left to fend for themselves. I’ll show them every day that they mean the world to me, and love them so much that they’ll never have a moment’s doubt that they’re not my top priority—no matter what else is going on in my life!’
Seeing the determination and distress mirrored in her lovely features, Blaise felt his heart helplessly contract. Recalling his own father’s vile temper, and what the consequences of that had been like for him and his mother, he realised his home life had been a fairytale compared to what Maya had been through. There were no doubts in his mind that she would make a terrific mother one day…not to mention a wonderful wife to some very, very fortunate man.
‘I found his body after he’d hung himself,’ she told him softly.
CHAPTER TEN
SHAKING his head in disbelief, Blaise sensed his stomach violently turn over. ‘What?’
Maya stared down at the table. Her long dark hair fell gently forward, partially shielding her.
‘He was in his studio…I’d just returned from buying some groceries—he never thought about food when he was working and the cupboard was bare.’ She glanced up and grimaced. ‘I called out to him but he didn’t answer. I knew he was working, trying his best to get something new going after a long period of not being able to work at all, so I put the food away and made us both a cup of tea.’
‘You don’t have to go on if this is too painful.’
‘I want to. I haven’t spoken to anyone about it for a long time, and I—and I need to.’
‘Then I want to listen.’
‘Anyway…I knocked on the door and called out again—not so loud as to disturb him from his train of thought, just clear enough that he could hear me. Still he didn’t answer. I carefully opened the door and glanced in.’
Her chin wobbled a little, and Blaise’s breath was suddenly trapped inside his chest.
‘He was hanging by a rope he’d tied onto the chandelier—it was a fairly hefty, lavish affair—and little shards of glass lay shattered and broken beneath his feet on the table that he’d dragged over so that he could—so that he could—’ Covering her face with her hand, she began to cry softly.
For a frozen second Blaise couldn’t make himself move. Then he was on his feet, moving swiftly round to her side, pulling her gently upright and guiding her head down onto his chest. Almost immediately her hot tears dampened his shirt, and he rained tender little kisses over her silken hair, breathing in her sweetly perfumed shampoo and feeling her slender body shudder against him.
‘Cry as much as you want to, sweetheart,’ he crooned. ‘I won’t let you go. I’ll just keep on holding you.’
‘This isn’t what you hired me for…to behave like some emotional wreck and have you take care of me.’
‘Are you crazy? Do you honestly think it’s a hardship for me to hold you like this after what we’ve shared?’
‘All these years,’ she whispered against his shirt, ‘I’ve kept on thinking that if I’d only got back sooner…or if I hadn’t gone to the shops at all…he might—he might still be here…’
‘No, Maya…sweetheart, I think you’re wrong.’
‘How do you know?’ Trustingly, hopefully, she raised her face to his.
Folding his palms round her slim upper arms, Blaise breathed in deeply. ‘It sounds like he’d let himself descend too low into the pit of despair to be rescued by anyone…’ Unable to resist, he traced the tracks of her tears with the pad of his thumb. ‘Least of all you. He was meant to take care of you, Maya…not the other way round.’
