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His eyes widened. “Please don’t doubt me,” he pleaded. He breezed past me as if embarrassed he’d shown some actual emotion.
I guessed that was my cue to leave, so I turned toward the door in a daze, stunned by his response. It left me wondering not only if Kane loved me but if my father did too.
The Beginning of the End
It was hard to imagine I had ever been so small. I brushed my fingers over a picture of me sleeping peacefully in my father’s arms. I had to say, I was pretty adorable. Who knew I had been born with my crazy dark curls? My hair was as unruly then as it was now. I was torn between continuing to absorb the photo album Auggie had given me and getting ready for my date with Kane. It was a testament to the power the pictures held. I didn’t think anything could keep me away from Kane, especially since we’d missed our date last night and I was worried about him after the scene in my office yesterday. I kept reliving his kiss, which still had my lips feeling swollen, and his words—that I was one of the best things that had ever happened to him.
However, those pictures of me as a baby with my beautiful momma so full of life and with Auggie looking so happy were special beyond words. They were the only proof in existence that I had a momma and that my father had once loved me. The man who’d cradled me so gently and smiled down on his infant baby girl—me—that man didn’t exist anymore. I think that that Augustus would have wanted to be called Daddy instead of Auggie. The fact that he had given me evidence he was once a different man still had me in shock. Why, after all these years, did he share it with me?
I hadn’t let go of it since I’d left Auggie’s office. I’d pored over every page several times, trying to inhale my first year of life, documented by my momma. Everything from my birth to my first steps. Her little captions under some of the pictures were treasures. A few of my favorites were:
Daddy and his favorite girl.
Sweet baby girl said her first word today. Of course it was Dada.
I don’t care how tired I am—when I see this girl smile at me in the middle of the night, I can’t help but think I’m the luckiest woman in the world.
I sat up on my bed, set the photo album next to me, and wiped some tears out of my eyes. I desperately wanted to know how Momma could seem so happy in the pictures, then just days after some of them were taken, take her own life. Did Momma hide her demons? Is that why Auggie had never come to terms with her death?
Maybe I should bring the album with me. Perhaps Kane could give some insight, and I knew he would love to see it. It would make him smile and give him something to tease me about. I could tell he had still been down when he’d texted me before I fell asleep last night. Good night, darlin’, was all he’d said. Normally, he would text something longer and sexier like, I can’t stop thinking about you. You don’t know how often I look at the empty pillow next to me and imagine your hair splayed across it and you smiling back at me. I would blush even when I was alone before I texted back that I couldn’t wait for that day. Then I would drift off to sleep the happiest woman in the world.
Bringing the album, though, probably wasn’t feasible. We would be hiking to Edge of the World and then swimming. I didn’t want anything to happen to it. I would show him later tonight after we got back. We had plenty of time together before I left for school, assuming Auggie didn’t have any more unexpected business trips to send him on. School, I sighed. Three more weeks.
Normally I couldn’t wait to get back to school, but Kane had me wishing for an endless summer of being in his arms. This summer was nothing like I had envisioned. I’d thought living at home with Lady Deathstrike was going to be torturous; instead, it had ended up being the best summer of my life. While Eva would never be my favorite, her son always would be. I smiled, thinking back to our parents’ wedding. How our relationship began with him rescuing me from getting my hand stuck in my lacy bra, all due to my ring and those pesky cake crumbs that had taken a deep dive down my chest. That would be quite the story to tell as we got older.
