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With no thought for my mental health, he tipped my chin up with his finger. “Still hiding secrets behind those eyes of yours, I see.”
How often had he said that to me during the best summer of my life? He’d said it until I had believed he truly wanted to know them. I had shared my innermost thoughts with him, my hopes and dreams. Then he’d left me. I turned my head from him. I wasn’t hiding secrets anymore, except maybe the one regarding how much I wished things could have turned out differently for us. I would never tell him I still dreamed about him and ached for his touch. Or how much I missed his laughter and ability to get me to come out of my shell. No, he would never know my secrets again.
“No secrets here. Thanks, again.” I turned and headed toward my room.
“Scarlett, we should talk.”
I paused at the door. “What about? A bathroom schedule? This one is all yours. I’ll use the hall bath.”
“I don’t want to talk about the bathroom. Hell, I’ll use the one in the hall. Will you please just look at me?” he pleaded.
I gripped the doorknob for support. “I can’t.”
“I’ll put some pants on.”
“That won’t help.”
“Tell me what will,” he begged.
I rested my forehead against the door. “Why does it matter to you?”
“Scarlett—”
A loud timer went off.
“Damn,” Kane exclaimed under his breath. “The chicken is done. We’ll pick this conversation up later.”
I didn’t think that was a good idea. I rushed into my room, shut the door, and leaned against it, trying not to hyperventilate. What was wrong with me? I was a grown woman now. A doctor. Not some wide-eyed coed who had zero experience with men.
I couldn’t stay here. Maybe Mindy would let me stay with her and her family. Though she’d just had baby number three. I’m sure I could deal with a crying baby all hours of the night. In fact, I could use some baby snuggles. Or I could get a hotel. I did have a high-paying job, after all.
A knock on my bedroom door interrupted my thoughts. I planned on ignoring it, figuring it was half-naked Kane.
“Scarlett, are you in there?” my father’s gruff voice surprised me.
I padded over to the door and opened it, ready to give Auggie a piece of my mind. I say that, yet I knew I wouldn’t. Instead, I stood there, looking at him and silently begging him to see me. To love me.
He, too, seemed at a loss for words as he ran his hands through his still-thick-ish, now-silver hair. I was so glad he had stopped dying it in an effort to look younger. Maybe, since he wasn’t marrying a new woman every year or two he felt like he could show his age a bit. For sixty-three, he looked great. He was trim with an athletic build and tan from being out on the golf course making deals and keeping up appearances. I was pretty sure Botox was a friend of his.
“Hi, Dad, I mean Auggie.” I slipped up and called him what I always wished he would be—my dad. Not only my father.
“You made it,” he stated the obvious.
“It would appear so.” I smiled.
The corners of his lips twitched which was saying something for the man who never smiled. “How was the drive?” He seemed about as uncomfortable as I felt, not knowing what to say.
“Long, but good.”
“Good.” He nodded.
“Good,” I replied, not knowing what else to say. I think most daughters would have flown into their father’s arms by now and said how much they missed them. I longed to do that, but I didn’t miss Auggie. I missed out on him, and I desperately wanted to find him. Where was the man in the pictures I held so dear? The man who once adored infant me. More than anything, that’s why I had come home. I knew deep within me that I had to know that man.
“Dinner is in fifteen minutes,” he replied.
Great. More time with Kane. I hoped he put on some clothes before we ate.
“Thank you for letting me know.” I assumed we were done and began to shut the door.
As the door started to close, Auggie did something unprecedented. He reached out and rested his hand on my shoulder. I think the last time he touched me was when he’d literally patted me on the back when I’d graduated from medical school. I stared at his large hand, wishing I knew what it felt like to hold it. Would I feel secure and like I belonged?
Auggie cleared his throat. “I’m glad you’re here,” he rushed to say. His hand popped off, and he jetted away.
I watched him walk down the long hall, wondering what had just happened. It was one of the most tender things he had ever said to me. It had me wanting more from him. Unfortunately, it also had me thinking maybe I shouldn’t go to Mindy’s or a hotel.
