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The look in her eyes of someone already world-weary with the burden of her knowledge and yet at the same time full of the anguish and fear of a child, tore at his guts.
'Don't look at me like that,' he begged her.
'We can't do those things,' Annalise told him sadly.
'We're too young. They won't let us.... Your family will hate me if you leave university. You'll end up hating me, too, and our baby....'
'No,' Jack denied immediately. 'Never, ever...
Please don't say that, Lise....'
There was no one else on the river path and impulsively Jack pulled her into his arms, holding her tightly against his body, his voice muffled against her hair as he told her how much he loved her and how much he would always love her.
Annalise wept quietly in his arms. Already she knew that his love on its own wasn't going to be enough to protect them from what lay ahead of them.
With an immense effort she managed to control her tears. She wasn't a girl any more now...a child...she was a woman.
'Did you tell anyone that you were coming home?'
she asked Jack.
Jack shook his head.
'No. I wanted to see you first,' he repeated. 'We need to make plans, Lise,' he warned her as gently as he could. 'I have to speak to your father....'
'No! Promise me you won't say anything to anyone—not yet—promise me, Jack,' she implored. She was so distressed that Jack felt he had no option other than to agree.
Suddenly she was a child again, terrified of her parents' anger, shivering as she moved closer to the warmth and protection of Jack's body.
'They'll make us stop seeing one another,' Annalise told him despairingly, her eyes full of fear.
They can't,' Jack reassured firmly. 'No one can make us do anything we don't want to do, Annalise.'
'This isn't the way I wanted it to be,' Annalise responded miserably, looking away from him. 'I never wanted this.' Her voice broke over the words and Jack closed his eyes.
'I've got to go home,' she burst out. 'My father will be back soon. I wish this was all just a horrible dream and I could open my eyes and everything would be back to normal.' She was crying again, the noisy racking sobs of a child this time. Jack's own throat felt raw with pain and dread and with guilt. He had done this to her.
'Promise me that you'll stop worrying,' he begged her. 'We're in this together.' But Annalise could only look sorrowfully at him. It wasn't the same for him.
How could it be?
As he watched her walk away from him, Jack's heart turned over. She looked so thin and frail. He wished he knew more about what was going to happen to her. Olivia, his sister, had had two children but he had not really paid much attention to the progress of her pregnancies. He was dreading the thought of having to break his news to Jon and Jenny.
Aunt Jenny would surely understand, though. She had been pregnant herself when she and Uncle Jon had married. That was no secret. The baby had died shortly after it was born, Jack knew that.
He brushed his hand across his eyes. He had hoped that ultimately when he had qualified as a solicitor he would be able to join the family practice here in Haslewich—but that couldn't happen now.
As he made his way to Jon and Jenny's he tried to think of how he might best earn a living. The future seemed frighteningly daunting but Annalise and their baby had to be his prime concern—not himself.
EVEN NOW Saul wasn't sure just why he had turned off the main road on his way home from work, taking the side road that went past Livvy's. It wasn't because he cherished any secret forbidden passion for her.
Those feelings had been completely swept away by his love for Tullah, but he did care about Olivia. She was still Livvy and he wanted to see her, wanted to offer her a shoulder to lean on if she should need one—he knew she was far too proud and independent to ask for help.
As Livvy's house loomed up ahead of him a cau-tionary voice warned him that it might have been wiser to discuss his feelings with Tullah before acting on them, but it was too late to heed that voice now.
OLIVIA'S FIRST intimation that she had a visitor came when Ally, the retriever, newly returned by the ken-nels where she had been staying whilst they were away, started to bark. The girls were both upstairs doing their homework and Olivia had been trying to motivate herself to start sorting through Caspar's things.
Relieved at having this task postponed she hurried to open the door.
'Saul...'
The feeling that filled her as she saw the tall and sexily handsome person of her second cousin walking towards her was the closest thing she had known to happiness in a long, long time.
Her voice caught in her throat as he reached her and then, to her own chagrin and Saul's obvious concern, she promptly burst into tears. Immediately Saul wrapped her in his arms as he hugged her tightly in a brotherly embrace.
'Hey, come on,' Olivia heard him protest against her hair as he squeezed her comfortingly.
'Let's get inside....'
Still keeping one arm around her he turned to close the front door before bending to pat Ally and then guide Olivia into the kitchen where he insisted that she sit down whilst he made them both a cup of tea.
'I heard about you and Caspar,' he told her.
'You and the entire population of Haslewich,' Olivia returned with a brave attempt at a normal bantering manner that made Saul's mouth curl in a gently re-proving smile.
'This is me, Livvy,' he reminded her quietly. 'You can take down the defences. What the hell is Caspar thinking about?' he demanded fiercely. 'He's a fool to let you go....'
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'I didn't give him much alternative,' Olivia admitted. 'It just wasn't working for us any more, Saul. We were picking fights with one another all the time and for the girls' sake...' She stopped speaking and took a deep breath. Saul was right. She didn't need to put up any defences against him. They were as close as though they were brother and sister and could easily at one time have been even closer...Saul had wanted her and she...
Saul was still an impossibly handsome and sensually appealing man, the kind of man any woman could be forgiven for wanting. He had a very special male strength about him and, right now, Olivia ached to have a man like Saul to lean on, a man like Saul to protect her, cherish her...
But Saul was married to Tullah she reminded herself sharply. Saul loved Tullah and she loved him and she had no right to be thinking what she was thinking, no matter how sorry for herself she might be feeling.
'What's wrong?' Saul asked her gently. 'And don't try telling me "Nothing." If you're having second thoughts about this separation...'
'No, it isn't that,' Olivia told him. She stopped and took a deep breath. The urge to confide in him couldn't be denied.
'Saul. I've done the most dreadful thing,' she told him in a wobbly voice. For a moment she thought he was going to respond with some teasing throw-away comment but then he gave her a penetrating look and instead said quietly, 'Tell me.'
Haltingly she did.
'...and now I don't know what to do,' she admitted.
'I can't bear to think what Jenny must think of me.
My behaviour was so appalling.' Tears burned her voice. 'I feel so ashamed, Saul.'
'Would you like me to have a word with Jenny for you...explain...?' Saul suggested.
Immediately Olivia shook her head.
'No. I want to speak to her myself...to explain to her myself...I have to, I can't hide behind someone else—not even you.'
'I'm sure she'll understand,' Saul comforted her.
'Jenny knows you, Livvy. She loves you and she'll know how you must be feeling.'
