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With those annoying parting words, Brian finally moves around me and down the steps. As I watch him go, I feel kind of good knowing I have the upper hand. Knowing that I’m the one in charge of Brian’s fate instead of the other way around.

Too bad I have no idea what the hell to do with all of this power.

Chapter 30: Drunk Princess

“He broke up with me,” I whimper with a quivering lip.

“He didn’t break up with you. He’s giving you face. Mace. Shpace. Holy shit, what’s in this wine?” Ariel mutters, holding up our third empty bottle and peering down into it.

As soon as Brian left my house, I immediately went back inside and called PJ. He was worried about me, and rightfully so. I don’t think I managed to string together anything other curse words the entire ten minutes we were on the phone. I don’t even know how he understood what I was saying with all the “fucks” and “piece of shit asshole” that were flying around.

He asked me if I was okay. He told me to stay strong. He told me he’d come over as soon as he was finished at the club. And while he did show up during my hour of need, thinking back on it now, there was something off with him. I thought for sure he would curse louder than me and threaten to kick Brian’s ass. I mean, not that I need anyone to fight my battles for me and he knows that, but the gesture would have been nice. He still held me in his arms and reassured me that everything would be okay, but something was different about his behavior, and I just couldn’t put my finger on it. I was too fired up and too distracted with the decision I had to make to notice it at the time. Now that three days have gone by, all I can do is replay every word he said every touch he gave me.

I’ve called him a million times and texted him even more than that since he left me that night. He always replies, asking me if I’m okay, but that’s it. He hasn’t showed up, he hasn’t reached out to me on his own, and I don’t know whether to be sad or completely pissed off.

He made me fall in love with him. He encouraged me to be strong and independent. And now, when I need him the most, he’s keeping his distance, and that’s making me feel weak and needy. I need him to tell me again that everything will be okay. I need him to reassure me that this doesn’t change anything between us. It doesn’t change anything with me, I know that for sure. The first words out of Brian’s mouth made want to punch him in the face and then punch myself in the face for thinking I was ever in love with that man.

He makes me feel small and he makes me feel inadequate, everything PJ has never made me feel, until now.

“I don’t want or need space. I don’t understand. I told him when he was here that just the sight of Brian made me want to throw up, and he knows I kicked him out and how he’s staying at a hotel until I make up my mind. I just don’t understand why he won’t talk to me,” I complain, finishing off my glass of wine and holding out the glass for Ariel to pour more.

She grabs a new bottle we uncorked earlier and sloppily refills my glass, spilling some of the wine all over my hand, which I of course lick off as I bring the glass back up to my mouth.

“I can’t believe that piece of shit just showed up here out of the blue expecting you to lie for him. Tell me he looked like straight up asshole, all dirty with his clothes a wrinkled mess and a receding hairline, with a big old beer gut hanging over the waistband of his pants,” Ariel pleads as she starts swaying from side-to-side on the new couch in the front room, which I just bought with my stripping money.

It’s red and it’s bright and bold and I want to make out with it, it’s so pretty.

Tonight was supposed to be a celebration that the Naughty Princess Club is making enough money for me to catch up on bills and buy a new couch, along with being able to give Ariel and Belle a percentage of our earnings. But after the stress of the last few days, it’s turned into one big bitching session instead of a celebration.

“I really love my couch,” I muse, rubbing my palm over the soft suede.

Ariel snaps her fingers in front of my face.

“Fuckus! I mean, focus! You were just going to tell me how shitty Brian looks.”

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