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He touched the apple of her cheek with his finger. “You didn’t need me. You were brave and fierce on your own. I have seen a great many things during the centuries I’ve been alive. I’ve met a great many people. None have resisted my understanding the way you have.”
“I’m hardly a mystery. I’m just an average girl from Portsmouth, New Hampshire.”
“You let him go.”
Raven’s body stiffened. She turned away, looking out over the extensive gardens that bordered the villa, and at the lights that shone dimly over them.
“I didn’t let him go. We sent him to the police.”
“Human justice is flawed.”
“Is vampyre justice better?” Her eyes sought his, challenging him.
“Vampyres know little enough about justice. They know vengeance and revenge, instead.”
“Then kill him. Bring him to me and kill him now.”
William moved so quickly he was almost a blur. He placed her in his chair and stood before her. “Finally,” he said, turning toward the door.
“And when he’s dead and we’re standing over his corpse, what will we have accomplished?”
He faced her. “He would be dead and his soul would be in hell.”
“I don’t believe in an afterlife. So he’s dead. Then what?”
William peered down at her. “Your life continues, content in the knowledge he paid for his sins and will trouble you no more.”
“My life didn’t end because of him. That idea grants him too much power.”
William’s gaze fell to her injured leg, which was peeking out from under the bedsheet.
“He deserves to pay.”
“Yes, he does. Can a dead man heal my leg? Can a corpse erase my memories or end my nightmares?”
William clenched his jaw so tightly Raven almost heard the bones creak. “I should think you would achieve satisfaction from his suffering. And yes, I think your nightmares would end.”
“Only to be replaced by different ones—nightmares in which I’m forced to look at a man whose death I caused.” Raven stood on unsteady feet, clutching the sheet to her chest. “He stole from me. What he stole I can’t get back, even if I kill him.”
“That’s rubbish,” William exclaimed. “He stole from you. You steal his life from him. Since what you steal is greater, you win.”
“Winning?” She laughed bitterly. “What would I win? Money, power, my family? His death gives me nothing, but it would take away what I want most—to live a life where I can sleep at night, knowing I’ve done the best I could with what I have. That’s the life I deserve. I won’t let him steal it from me as well.”
William pressed his lips together, as if he were resisting the urge to argue.
She gestured to herself. “I am not a killer. I won’t let him turn me into one. He doesn’t have that power.”
“All humans have the potential to be killers.” William’s tone was glacial. “They simply need sufficient motivation.”
Raven’s green eyes flashed and she stood toe to toe with him. “How’s this for motivation? I hate him. With every atom of my being, I hate him. If I had a soul, I’d hate him with that, too. But I love myself more.”
“Forgiveness doesn’t entail the negation of justice.”
“I haven’t forgiven him. I don’t have it in me.”
“Then leave him to me,” William hissed, his face inches from hers. “I won’t tell you what becomes of him. You can forget he ever existed.”
Raven looked down at her injured leg. “You don’t understand. I’ll never be able to forget him.”
William cursed, a string of profanities Raven did not understand.
She placed her palm over his heart. “Will you hunt everyone who ever troubled me? Will you kill my ex-boyfriend, who humiliated me and broke my heart? Will you kill my friend Gina because she hurt my feelings the other day?”
“Yes.”
“I don’t need you to be my angel of death.” Raven withdrew her hand.
William was quiet for so long, Raven worried he’d gone into a trance. Pain flamed in her injured leg, driving her back to the chair.
He stood over her, his expression conflicted. “I was like you once.”
“Before you became a vampyre?”
He nodded.
“What happened?”
His face hardened. “I watched goodness die, not once, but twice. And I lost hope.”
She reached for him, closing her hand over his cool fingers. “You told me once that I was hope, dancing in your arms.”
He stared at their hands, then slowly skimmed his lips over her forehead.
“Would that you had enough hope for both of us.”
Her grip on him tightened.
“You remind me of someone,” he whispered.
“Who?”
“A saint.”
A laugh escaped Raven’s throat. “I think in order to become a saint, you need to believe in God.”
“I believe. I simply think God is a monster.”
“I don’t understand why you still believe in him if you hate him so much.”
“Some things can’t be disbelieved.” He bowed his head. “But you—you’ve changed me.”
“How?”
“Before we met, I wouldn’t have thought twice about taking a life had I decided the life was worthless.”
“And now?”
William covered their connection with his other hand. “Even though I desperately wish to end him, I would rather please you.”
She brought her lips to his fingers and kissed them. “Now I know why you need to spend the daylight hours in solitude and meditation. No one could spend centuries making decisions like this and not need time to think and find peace.”
He lifted her hand, lacing their fingers together. “We are susceptible to a kind of madness because of our longevity. Resting the mind keeps it at bay.”
Raven’s eyes widened. “Madness?”
“The madness that turns a vampyre into a feral.”
She gazed up at him in horror. William continued. “I’m afraid that’s not the worst of it. In addition to the possibility of madness, there’s the curse.”
“What curse?”
“During the war with the Curia, they cursed us with a life span of only a thousand years. When a vampyre approaches that age, he begins to go mad. I suppose it’s like the senility of old age in a human. Then, on or around the one-thousandth year, the vampyre dies.”
“I thought vampyres were immortal.”
“They were once. But their immortality was taken away by the Curia. One more reason why we hate and fear them.”
“How old are you, William?”
“I was turned in 1274. But this is a secret, Cassita. Even those closest to me in the Consilium don’t know my true age.”
“Why not?”
“Several of them are already covetous of my throne. I don’t wish them to be able to pinpoint my weakness.”
She forced a smile. “I knew you’d outlive me.”
“That is one of life’s greatest tragedies.” He hesitated. “Unless you become like me.”
She disentangled herself from his grasp. “I don’t want to live that long.”
“I won’t let such beauty die,” he whispered.
“But you’ll have to, someday.” Raven smiled sadly. “Art is the only beauty that never dies.”
He kissed her, until she opened to him. With a growl, he plunged into her mouth. She wrapped her arms around his neck, anchoring him to her.
Without warning, he swung her into his arms and strode inside toward the bed.
