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“Wow, that’s quite a feat of imagination,” I say.
“Wha—!” he exclaims, slamming the sketchbook shut. “You little snoop!”
“What’s going on?” Sissy murmurs, her eyes blinking with sleep. “Take it easy,” I say. “When you’re done with your, um, draw- ings, mind giving me help with the steering? The current’s got
strong.”
I head to the bow, angling the rudder pole until the boat slowly rights itself. From inside the cabin, Epap is barking about something.
After a few minutes, it’s David, not Epap, who comes out to lend a hand.
Whoa, he mouths, seeing the river. “We’re going really fast.” He grabs the other pole.
Epap is speaking to Sissy at the stern, his arms spread wide for balance. She shakes her head in response, pointing at the sun- columned but still overcast skies. Epap edges closer to her, his hands waving excitedly. They continue speaking, intensely, but I can’t hear a word over the roar of the river. I walk over.
“. . . river,” he’s saying to her.
“What are you talking about?” I say as I approach them. Epap shoots me a disagreeable look. “It’s nothing.”
I face Sissy. “What about the river?”
“The river is wet!” Epap sneers. “Now start minding your own business!”
“You’re thinking of docking, aren’t you?” I say to Sissy. “To hunt for food.”
Sissy doesn’t answer, only stares at the river, her jaw clenched. “Let me tell you,” I say, “that’s a wrong move. That’s a mistake.” “Nobody asked for your opinion,” Epap says, positioning him-
self between me and Sissy.
“Getting off this boat is a big mistake, Sissy,” I say, stepping around Epap. His back bristles with annoyance. “Didn’t we learn anything from last night? There’s—”
“What part of ‘mind your own business’ do you not understand?” Epap snarls. “In fact, just go get the rope lines ready. We’ll need to anchor this boat down once we land.”
“Are you out of your mind? They want to eat us—”
Epap’s head flies around, raw disdain swimming in his eyes. “Oh, really, figured that one out yourself, did you?”
“Listen! They might still be out there—”
“Not anymore, they aren’t,” Epap says. “Don’t you know any- thing about them? I’m surprised how little you know considering you’ve lived in their midst your whole life. Hello, the sun burns them up. And hello, the sun is shining down now.”
“It’s not enough sun. The hunters, they’re clever, they improvise, they have technology, they have determination. You underestimate them at your own peril.”
“The only thing out there is food,” Epap yells back. “There’s wildlife running everywhere, it’s like a petting zoo out there. Must have seen at least three prairie dogs already. Now, just leave the deci- sion making to Sissy and me.”
“Epap,” Sissy says. She shakes her head. “I don’t know. Maybe it’s too risky.”
A wounded expression crosses his face. “But Sissy, I don’t under- stand. You just agreed to go hunting for food.” His eyes are equal parts confused and incredulous. “You know how hungry we are. Think of poor Ben.”
“Of course. But let’s be level-headed about this, OK?”
“No, Sissy, you just agreed with me. That we should dock and go hunting.”
“I’m trying to be careful—”
“Is it because of him?” Epap says, jabbing a finger at me. “Just because he said we shouldn’t dock, and suddenly you’re agreeing with him?”
“Stop.”
“Because of him?”
“Epap! I’m not saying we stay off the land for good. But let’s wait for the skies to clear. For the sun to really scorch the land. If we have to wait until tomorrow, then we wait. An extra day of hunger isn’t going to kill us. But rashly and prematurely going on land just might.” Epap turns his back to her, anger fuming off his narrow shoulders.
“Why’re you so quick to get on his good side? I can’t believe you’re siding with him!”
“I’m not siding with anyone. I’m siding with reason. With what’s best for all of us.”
“What’s best for you! You want him to think well of you, that’s why you’re siding with him!”
“OK, I’m done arguing,” she says and walks away.
Epap glares at her back. He’s still got anger to burn. “See what you’ve done?” he says to me. “You think you’re so smart, don’t you? You think you’re such a tough guy. Oh, look at me, I survived for years living in their midst. Oh, look at my swagger. You know, you’re just ridiculous to me.”
Don’t be baited, walk away, I tell myself.
“Did you want to be one of them?” Epap says in a low voice. “Were you ashamed of who you are?”
I stop in my tracks.
“Because I’ve seen the way you look at us. I’ve seen the smugness on your face,” he says, his lips twisting into a gnarl. “You look down on us. It pains you to have to associate with us. Deep down, you look up to them, don’t you? Deep down, you probably want to be one of them.”
“Epap, drop it,” Sissy says. She’s turned around again, watching us carefully.
“You have no idea,” I say to Epap, my voice tight. “Come again?” he says, a silly grin on his face.
“You have no idea what they are. If you did, you’d never have said something so stupid.”
“I have no idea? Really? I mean, really? I have no idea?” He glares at me with naked derision. “You’re the one who has no idea. But then again, why would you? You’ve rubbed shoulders with them, been buddies with them all your life. You’ve never seen them rip your parents to shreds. You’ve never seen them tear the limbs off your
sister or brother right in front of you. You don’t know them the way we do.”
“I know them better than you think,” I say. My voice is low and even-keeled, but bunched, ready to be unleashed at a split second’s notice. “Trust me on that one. I mean, what do you really know of them? They’ve been little more than your doting nannies, feeding you, clothing you, baking you birthday cakes—”
Epap comes at me, his finger pointing like a talon. “Why you—” Sissy pulls his arm down. “Enough, Epap!”
“There you go again,” he cries. “Why are you always so quick to side with him? Enough, Epap, stop, Epap. What is he to you? Why do you . . . oh, forget it!” He tears his arm away from her. “You want to go hungry together, go ahead. But if we get sick, if we starve, it’s on you, don’t you forget that.”
“Quit with the melodrama, Epap.” Her chest heaves up and down. He casts his eyes away, doesn’t say anything. Then suddenly leaps at me, his momentum catching me and sending our bodies crashing hard against the deck. The wooden boards drum hollow
on our impact.
A curious, deep thump rumbles beneath me. As if I’ve jarred something loose under the boat.
Epap is cursing and swinging on top of me, and it’s all I can do to deflect his blows. Then Sissy is prying him off me, her face a furi- ous red.
“We’ve got enough to deal with!” she shouts. “We need to focus on fighting them, not each other!”
Epap spins around, stares at the riverbank. He runs a hand through his hair, his breathing ragged. But I’m not paying attention to him. All my focus is on the deck under me. I knock on it. The same hollow thump reverberates back. I knock the deck a metre away, and a thump of a different timbre sounds back.
