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But for this moment he wanted to just hold her, look up at the moon and pretend that everything was okay.
* * *
Emily woke up in the middle of the night having to go to the bathroom. This was something that had only started in the last week. She had read in one of her prenatal books that things like this were only the beginning.
Rafe was cuddled behind her and propped himself up on an elbow as she climbed from the bed. “You okay?” he asked.
“Yes. Be right back.”
He fell back down on the pillow and she knew he was tired. They’d resolved nothing except that they still wanted each other. But she felt as if this time they’d done more than just have sex. Rafe meant more to her than any other guy she’d ever dated, and she acknowledged that it had nothing to do with the fact that he was the father of her child—and yet at the same time had everything to do with that.
He made her feel more alive than anyone else ever had, and that was dangerous. She didn’t want to rely on him. He could sleep in her bed and come to her bar. Hell, he could even be involved with their baby, but she didn’t want to care for him.
She washed her hands and leaned forward to look at herself in the mirror.
“Don’t fall for him,” she warned herself. But she sort of already knew that it was too late.
That falling for Rafe was a foregone conclusion now.
He’d come to her in the middle of the night. Wanted to defend her. Everyone knew she could take care of herself, but he still wanted to protect her.
That made her feel so safe. So cherished.
Things that had never mattered to her before tonight.
She shook her head.
He had to want something. There had to be a reason he was here tonight. She wanted it to be for her, but maybe it was about the baby. Now that the world knew about their child, the decisions they’d been making together took on a different quality. Whatever he did could impact his people back in Alma.
She knew that. She wanted it to not matter, but she knew it did.
And she also was very aware that she wasn’t cut out to be a queen or consort or whatever the hell they had in Alma.
Maybe that was why he was here.
She left the bathroom and stood in the doorway leading back into the bedroom, watching him as he lay sleeping, his big, strong, sexy body taking up too much of her bed, his face relaxed in sleep. He didn’t seem as if he had an agenda. He didn’t act as if there were some reason he was in her bed other than that he wanted to be there.
But she knew there had to be more.
She lived in the real world, and stained glass mermaid aside, Rafe had always been very real with her. . When they’d spent their one weekend together, he’d made it clear that would be it. As had she. And when she’d barged in on him in Miami and told him she was pregnant he hadn’t pretended they were suddenly a couple.
“I thought you got lost, Red.”
She thought she did, too. The first time she’d looked into his hazel eyes.
“I almost did. Why are you here, Rafe?” she asked.
“Come back to bed,” he said.
She walked over and sat on the edge of the bed, but he lifted the sheets and gestured for her to come closer. She wanted to. She started to lie down in the curve of his body but stopped herself.
“I need some answers. So far all we’ve done is establish what we both already knew. We want each other. We have some kind of lust that won’t be denied. But I need some answers.”
“Okay.”
“Okay?”
“Sure. Ask your questions,” he said, sitting up and propping his back on the headboard. “I figured we’d do this in the morning.”
“I don’t think I can sleep until I know if you are going to take my child from me.”
She hadn’t meant to say it that way. But it was 3:00 a.m. and her guard was down. Her fears were all around her. Rafe was a powerful man before she even factored in the fact that he was about to become the ruler of a foreign land.
“Hell. No. I’m not going to take our child from you,” he said. “Why would you think I’d do that? I’m not an asshole.”
She swallowed hard. “I know you aren’t. But we both know I’m not the kind of woman your family has been hoping you’ll marry. And now that the world knows I’m carrying the king of Alma’s child, I think the stakes have changed.”
He reached for her. Took her hand in his and brought it to his mouth. He dropped a warm kiss in the center of her palm before placing her hand on his chest right over his heart.
“I haven’t changed, Red. I’m still the man you know. I’m not going to let anything change me.”
She wanted to believe him. But the monarchy was bigger than Rafe, whether he wanted to admit it or not.
