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He realized instantly that it was the wrong thing to say.
“For how long?” She sat up and his hand fell away. He missed the warmth immediately. “Until you get a new football contract and take off? You don’t do relationships. I don’t do relationships. Are you prepared to figure out why the hard way—with each other?”
“Yes,” he said instantly. “Stop making this so difficult. If I get a contract, you come with me. Simple.”
The alternative was unthinkable. Actually, he’d never thought about these kinds of things. Never had a reason to. Women came, women left. But this one—he had an opportunity here to grab on to her tight with both hands and no matter how much it scared him, he wasn’t letting go.
Catching her lip between her teeth, she worried it almost raw. “What if we get my father to retract the engagement announcement and everything is wonderful. We can date in the open. And then we find out the only thing we had going for us was the secrecy?”
“What, you’re afraid I won’t be keen on all of this if we don’t have to sneak around?” A laugh slipped from his mouth before he fully registered the serious set of her jaw. It finally dawned on him. “That’s what you’re afraid of.”
She shifted uncomfortably. “It’s a real possibility.”
“It’s a real possibility that you’ll figure out the same thing,” he shot back and the wracked expression on her face floored him. “You already thought of that.”
Ice formed instantly in his stomach. It had never occurred to him while they were confessing unexpected feelings that he hadn’t actually removed the complications. The real complications might only be beginning. Falling for each other didn’t magically make either of them relationship material and the potential to hurt each other was that much greater as a result.
Sometimes, no matter how much you practiced, you still missed the goal. And neither of them actually had much practice. What were the odds of success?
“Why do you think I got so upset?” she countered. “You’re giving me everything I’ve ever wanted, and then you give me things I had no idea I wanted, and my heart does all this crazy stuff when you look at me, and when you kiss me it’s like my life finally makes sense, and what if I’m the one who’s building up this relationship into something mythical because I really like my men with a side of forbidden?”
“Okay, breathe.”
He half laughed and ran a hand through his hair. This rated as the most honest conversation he’d ever had with a woman. And that made it all the more fascinating that he was still here, determined not to buckle. Bella was worth it.
She breathed. And then dropped the second bomb. “What if I want to get married someday? Is that potentially in the cards?”
He let the idea rattle around inside for a long moment, but it didn’t completely unnerve him to consider it. He wasn’t saying yes, but wasn’t saying no.
“What if it is?” He captured her gaze and held it, refusing to let her look away, where she might miss the sincerity of what he was telling her. “Will that scare you as well?”
His brother had predicted that, too. Silently, he cursed himself and then his omniscient twin. Well, he hadn’t proposed yet and no one was saying he would. Grandfather’s watch still belonged to James. For now.
“More than I could possibly tell you,” she admitted.
But she didn’t have to tell him because he had a pretty good idea that the adrenaline racing around in his body closely matched what was going on with her.
“And,” she continued swiftly, “I’m not saying that I will want to get married. To you or anyone. But what if I do?”
“You know what?” He tipped her chin up. “I think it’s a safe bet that we have more going on here than a forbidden love angle. And I also think that no matter what, we can be honest with each other about what’s going on, whether it’s marriage or something else. I might be wrong, but I’m willing to take that risk. Are you?”
“Will you hold my hand?” she asked in a small voice. “When you’re holding my hand, I feel like the world is a different place, like nothing bad could ever happen.”
Yeah, he got that. If they could do this together, it might actually work.
Tenderly, he laced his fingers with hers and held on. “I’ll never let go, not even when we hit the water. Jump with me, Bella.”
Her smile pierced his heart and he started to believe they might figure this out after all. There were a lot of unknowns, sure, and they still had to sort their families—which wouldn’t be as easy as he might be pretending. But it felt as if they were at the beginning of something wonderful.
