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‘I didn’t have to do it. I just found the courage, somehow, to lay bare my soul, despite not knowing how you would take hearing that I love you and respect you and will remain faithful to you.’
Elise’s dusky lashes lowered in confusion before flicking up so she might search his face for a sign he was teasing, or, worse, continuing to be dreadfully polite. But a glimmer of wonderment began rippling through her as his eyes remained steady despite self-mockery clouding their depths.
‘You will promise to give up your mistress for me?’ Heat spontaneously suffused her cheeks; the thought that had been spinning in her mind, making her jealous and miserable, had spurted forth from her lips of its own volition.
‘Of course...I already have. Did you seriously think I would not?’ His hands cupped her face, tilting up her chin so she must look at him. ‘I take my marriage vows seriously, Elise, that’s why I’ve not yet felt inclined to utter them.’
‘Neither have I,’ Elise whispered. ‘I know as a good daughter I should marry and not be a burden on my papa, but I’m glad I’ve not been asked as there’s been nobody that I’ve liked enough...until now.’
He smiled crookedly at her while brushing a thumb over her full pink lips. Instinctively Elise parted her mouth, touching moisture to soothe the sensitivity he’d trailed in his wake.
Alex dipped his head, ready to plunge his mouth on hers following her innocently erotic teasing.
‘What will become of her?’ Elise asked when their lips were merely a hair’s breadth apart. Her small palms caught either side of his abrasive jaw, tightening fiercely to hold him back. ‘How did your lady friend take knowing you are to be married?’ Elise knew she was being brazen in mentioning Celia Chase at all. A genteel young lady did not acknowledge the existence of a gentleman’s paramours; she certainly didn’t quiz him over them, even if she considered herself to be his future wife. Of course, in the eyes of the ton she was now sullied and need not adhere to their hypocrisies, she reminded herself, so promptly repeated her question.
‘I believe she is adequately supplied with admirers and will soon find another gentleman friend.’ Alex kept his tone neutral, his eyes on hers despite the temptation to let them fall to her alluring lips.
Elise was not content with that answer. How did she know if he might still number among Celia’s admirers? The thought of her husband secretly lusting after another woman pricked her pride. ‘Can you so easily suppress your feelings for Celia Chase?’ she demanded huskily.
‘Yes.’
‘And if I should decline your proposal?’
‘Then perhaps she would remain my friend... Who knows?’
There was a subtle challenge in his voice and velvet-brown eyes that was not lost on Elise. ‘So you do still love her and want to sleep with her...’ Elise’s brittle conclusion terminated in a gasp as Alex shifted alarmingly quickly, looming over her and trapping her back against the bench’s slats.
‘I don’t love her, Elise, and as for sleeping with her...I have no more desire to do so if we are to be married. I am not an adulterer. As I have told you.’ He dipped his raven head, smoothed his cool mouth against one of her flushed cheeks. ‘I love you, Elise. I want you...but if you were to reject me...not want me...you’d have no right to blame me for turning elsewhere.’
‘I do want you...’ Elise breathed. ‘I really do...’
Inwardly Alex smiled as he nuzzled her neck, causing her to blissfully sigh. She did love him and all that stood in the way of her trusting him was her wrongful perception of Celia Chase’s part in his life. How was he to explain that a man’s mistress often was no more important or useful to him than his tailor? In the way a gentleman might tire of a particular cut of clothing, so might he decide he’d outgrown his current paramour and look elsewhere for female company. He didn’t feel guilty or callous because of his point of view; he liked women he knew treated their role professionally and who were keen to benefit from the transaction. Alex knew fellows who had fallen in love with their mistresses and married them, but it had never occurred to him to seek more than shared passion and companionship from the women he bedded. Until he’d met Elise he’d not been sure that any woman could completely satisfy everything he needed from a wife.
‘Coup de foudre, I believe it’s called,’ Alex said softly. ‘From the moment you marched over to me to confront me at Vauxhall I was smitten even though I thought you were scheming Lady Lonesome. After you ran off I started scouring the crowds for a sight of you almost immediately.’ He twisted a smile. ‘I couldn’t believe my luck when I saw Hugh had joined your group and I realised I had a reason to approach you.’
