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‘If you are a good mother, then you will want the proper supervision of our son.’ Ash’s smile turned triumphant. ‘You will want him trained properly so that he is not a danger to himself and others.’ He stood up. ‘It must happen, Kara, he can’t stay tied to your apron strings. He is growing up. Do you want a son who is not respected and can’t hang on to this estate when you are gone? It is about what is best for Rurik, rather than what is best for your nerves.’
Kara struggled to control her temper. Less than a day home and Ash had already decided she was over-protective. She wanted to throw the bowl of salve at his head.
‘That goes without saying. And I have done everything in my power to make sure that Rurik is kept safe while you have been off travelling the world. It was one of the reasons I had been about to marry Valdar, to provide Rurik with a good father who would train him properly.’
‘You’re not marrying Valdar. He is the wrong sort of man for you.’
‘If you are going to be like that, leave.’ Kara pointed to the door. ‘This is my room, not yours. Remember that in the future. I refuse to discuss my relationship with Valdar. Ever.’
His eyes flashed dangerously and his hands clenched. Kara waited. A fluttering started in her stomach. A large part of her wanted him to kiss her again. Then, with a deliberate effort, he slowly unclenched his fists.
‘You misunderstand me because you want a fight. Because you remain angry with me for not returning sooner. I was an irresponsible fool when we married with no real appreciation of the important things. And I have grown up and I have returned, hopefully a wiser man. I do take my responsibilities seriously and know that good things are earned, not given by right. But I also know I am damaged. I can never be the man I once tried to be,’ he said in a quieter tone.
‘Damaged?’
‘I saw things no man should see.’ His face became clouded. ‘It is not easy to see your friends die and hear their screams long after the sea has swallowed them.’ He put up his hand. ‘I’ve no wish to burden you or have you feel pity for me. But I find the screams louder when I attempt to sleep in a bed.’
‘I want to know. I have a right to know.’
He was silent for a long time. ‘I’m not ready to talk about it. I’m not sure if I ever will be. Please don’t make it a condition.’
Kara gazed up at the knots in the ceiling beam. She had always envisioned sharing everything, but she had seen Ash’s tortured face earlier. She had to give him time. ‘When you are ready to talk, I am ready to listen, but until then you are on trial. You can train Rurik, but only if you clear everything with me in advance.’
‘Have you thought this through?’
Kara narrowed her gaze. ‘Those are my conditions.’
‘You did your best, but I want to play my part. I want to make sure our son grows up properly. It is why I am here in this room. It is best to reach an agreement before the sun sets. Isn’t that what you always said when you confronted me after a fight?’ His lips turned up in a smile which could melt the hardest heart. ‘Meet me halfway, Kara. Like you used to do.’
Kara fought against the urge to agree with him. It was so wrong of him to quote her earlier self. She had always made the effort before to smooth over any argument. Ash never had. His way of settling things had been to kiss her into submission...until now. And she did agree that Rurik’s supervision needed to be changed. She struggled to take a calming breath. ‘You were waiting for me here! The last place I would ever dream of looking for you. I have been looking everywhere for you.’
‘It seemed for the best—waiting for you somewhere where you would eventually return and where we could discuss things with a modicum of privacy. Whispers have a way of spreading and forcing people to take sides. The Viken court is a snakepit. Thorkell’s queen is poisonous.’ He inclined his head. ‘Was there something you wished to see me about? You said you were looking for me. Surely it was not to seek another kiss.’
Kara gazed at the tapestries, rather than looking at Ash.
‘Two things. I brought you some salve for your leg.’ She held out the bowl. ‘You should put it on every morning when you wake and at night. It does well for lame horses.’
‘And lame men?’
‘It may ease your leg if rubbed in regularly. I don’t promise a miracle. But in a few days’ time, you may find the pain easier to bear.’
He reached out, took the bowl and sniffed it. ‘One of your mother’s concoctions? It smells strong.’
