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‘You...what?’ Stephanie’s shriek could be heard in two counties. ‘Are you destined for a room in Bedlam?’
‘It was an infamous offer, made in such a way that he knew I had to refuse.’ Hattie tapped her foot, feeling her hard-won self-control starting to slip. ‘What sort of woman did he think I was?’
‘It was an offer, an offer that could have saved your life.’
‘I know the difference between a genuine offer and a pastry crust, easily made and easily broken off, Stephanie. Sir Christopher’s was one of the latter.’
Hattie lifted her chin proudly. ‘I told you after Charles died that I had no intention of marrying anyone and I meant it.’
‘I declare, Harriet Wilkinson, you carry your devotion to your dead soldier too far. I know Charles was the love of your life, but you are facing ruin. Ruin of the most public kind. You couldn’t afford to turn him down. Livvy can’t afford to have you turn him down.’
Hattie stared at her sister, torn between laughing and crying. What she felt for Charles was a schoolgirl crush that had long since vanished. The Kit-shaped hole in her heart would take far longer to mend. Until the night of the lecture, she’d really believed in him. But there was little point in explaining this to Stephanie. Stephanie only heard what she wanted to hear.
‘He made the offer with the expectation that I’d refuse,’ she said carefully. ‘He knew my feelings on marrying again.’
‘Was your first marriage that idyllic?’ Stephanie snapped. ‘People get married for reasons of duty and then make the best of it. Will you ever marry again, Hattie? Do you truly require perfection?’
Hattie regarded her hands. The old Hattie would have simply allowed the assumption to stand, but it was time she stopped hiding behind a façade. ‘You were always wrong about my marriage to Charles. It was a sham from start to finish and I only found out too late.’
‘Sham?’ Stephanie looked perplexed. ‘You were so in love with him.’
Rapidly and with as few words as possible, Hattie explained about her discovery and what she had done about it. Stephanie listened in absolute silence. Telling her proved far easier than telling Kit.
‘And now you see why I can’t marry Kit,’ Hattie finished.
‘Oh, Hattie, you should have said something!’ Stephanie held out her hand. ‘You are my sister. You should have trusted me enough to explain. I want the best for you.’
‘There was nothing you could do.’ Hattie gave a shrug. ‘And I thought if I pretended that it had never happened that it would go away.’
Stephanie rolled her eyes. ‘Perhaps you were right. If I had known, maybe I would have been more determined that you marry.’
Hattie glanced at Stephanie. A huge weight fell from her shoulders. Stephanie was behaving remarkably well. And she was right. She should have had enough courage to say the words years ago. ‘I most definitely wouldn’t have wanted more matchmaking. You’ve done enough as it is.’
Stephanie tapped a finger against her lips. ‘Do you love Sir Christopher?’
‘Yes...or rather I thought I did. I thought he was a different man.’ Hattie pressed her hands together. Her feelings for Kit were all jumbled up. She wanted to hate him, but a tiny piece of her kept trying to convince her that he was the sort of man for her. ‘Don’t you see, Stephanie? I have done the same thing again—fallen in love with an illusion.’
‘Sometimes, Hattie, you have to take a chance. You would have done everyone a favour. Think of the doors which would have opened for Livvy.’
Hattie shook her head. Trust Stephanie to be thinking of herself and her family’s advancement. ‘I refuse to marry simply to satisfy society, Stephanie.’
Stephanie pressed her lips together. ‘This is the first time Sir Christopher has offered marriage?’
‘To me? Yes.’ Hattie pleated her skirt between her fingers. ‘He only did it because of his mother, I am sure. He was adamant two days ago in his opposition to marriage. It is the only reason I can think of. Imagine being married because his mother forced the issue.’
‘His mother?’ Stephanie made a face. ‘Surely Sir Christopher is old enough to decide what to do without his mother’s input. Who is she that she commands such respect? If Sir Christopher is half the man he seems to be, he will have made the offer because he is worried about your reputation. This is typical of your excuses, Hattie. You see problems where there are none. You must trust me on this. I am your older sister.’
