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‘Spineless,’ Robert supplied, giving way slightly to jealousy. At her questioning glance, he shrugged. ‘Things you haven’t said. You had to force the elopement. Any fool would know that to be offered a chance with you is worth grabbing with both hands.’
‘You do wonders for my confidence.’ Her voice faltered. ‘I think that sort of love was a once-in-a-lifetime love. I’m not sure I ever want to have that sort of love again. Sometimes, it seems like it was so bloodless, so lacking in passion. You and I…we have passion but passion burns out quickly.’
Robert placed a kiss on her temple, silently vowing that somehow she would love him. It would be more than passion between them. But it had to come from her first, not him. He refused to risk the rejection. ‘Then we will be intimate friends who can forgive each other.’
‘I knew you would understand.’ She tightened her arms about him and snuggled down so her head rested on his bare chest.
‘Understand. Yes, I understand.’ He captured her lips and pulled her body firmly against his, allowing his body to say the words. ‘It is the best sort of friendship. And, Henri, I will protect you. We will keep this our secret.’
Chapter Fifteen
Henri woke the next morning alone in the unfamiliar bed. The bed curtains were pulled tight, but a shaft of sunlight peaked through.
Sometime while she slept, Robert had departed. Discreet, but somehow unsatisfactory. She would have enjoyed waking up in his arms.
Henri wriggled her toes, trying to find a warm spot, a tiny place to remind her that last night was not a dream. Nothing. And the more she tried to convince herself that this was a good thing and that she should be pleased by Robert’s thoughtfulness, the less pleased she was. She wanted to think that he’d reluctantly left her bed, and that he’d kissed her forehead as he’d done so, but she worried that it had been some half-remembered dream.
‘Ah, you’re awake, my lady.’ Grace came bustling into the room. ‘The master just sent me up to see if you were ready. He’s determined to catch them today. It’s terribly exciting being involved in a chase like this.’
‘We’ll find them,’ Henri said as positively as she dared.
Grace began to lay out Henri’s clothes, humming a little tune as she did so. Henri wondered uncomfortably if the maid suspected what had happened last night. Thankfully her clothes were piled neatly on a chair rather than being strewn across the room. Robert had proved a thoughtful maid. She’d have to remember the little details for the next time. The next time. The words had a pleasant ring.
Grace frowned holding up the gown Henri had worn the night before. ‘Whoever helped you to undress last night should have taken more care. One of your buttons has come loose and the ruffle on your left sleeve is torn. They will have to be seen to.’
‘It was my fault. Will it take long?’
‘I’m handy with a needle and thread. It will be mended before you have finished your coffee.’
Henri took a sip of the bitter liquid. A life of wickedness was going to mean changes and she was going to have to learn to sew better. She refused to be undone by a simple button or a torn ruffle. But she could understand now how women could be discovered. ‘Thank you, Grace. The sleeping powder appears to have worked.’
Grace bent her head, concentrating on threading a needle. ‘You’re lucky, ma’am. Travel appears to agree with you. I had so wanted to make a good impression on Mr Hudson, the coachman, and we had to stop because of me.’
‘We stopped because it was late and folly to continue,’ Henri said firmly. She took another sip of coffee, a plot formulating in her brain. Grace and the coachman. ‘The closed air of the carriage caused your problems. If the weather is fine, you should ride up with Mr Hudson, rather than down with me and Mr Montemorcy. I dare say you’ll find it easier.’
‘I couldn’t. I mean…’
‘With the wind on your face, you should be perfectly fine and then you can ensure that I don’t tear my lace when I undress.’
‘The wind on my face. You’re a marvel, ma’am!’ Grace held up the dress. ‘There, it is as good as new. No one will guess.’
Henri deftly turned the conversation to hairstyles. All she needed was a cool head and quick wit. The rest was easy.
* * *
Between the jolts in the carriage, which would have sent her flying towards Robert, and her sudden inability to make easy conversation, Henri discovered her confidence misplaced as the carriage rolled down the road towards Jedburgh. She kept thinking of things to say and then discarding them as trite. She had thought that Grace travelling up with Mr Hudson would make things easier, but somehow the silence felt awkward rather than intimate.
