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Chapter 1
Trepidation mingles with sweat and drips down my spine. The hospital gown feels like sandpaper against my sticky skin. Sean is standing next to me, squeezing my hand. I’m tipped backward in a position similar to gynecological visits—or the dentist. I’ve never liked that those offices seem to use the same chair, tipped to the same angle. Another contraction hits and turns my stomach into a wave of iron. It ripples, contracting so hard it feels as if I’ll tear in two. Gasping for breath, I dig my nails into Sean’s hand. Not on purpose. Actually, I don’t realize I’m practically ripping off his arm until the contraction passes.
“Sorry,” I gasp and smile at him sheepishly.
“For what?” He’s taken aback, gaping at me like I’m crazy. “For having a baby and being way too civil?”
No idea why, but that offends me. My jaw drops but before I can say anything, my abs turn to steel again without my consent. It feels like my skin is trying to crawl off my body. Or away from the very large round bump that was once a flat tummy. I thought I was fat then. I’m such an idiot. A cry rips from the back of my throat as Sean talks calmly, the way they taught him in the childbirth class. When it passes, I suck in air like it’s going out of style.
“Yeah, so why did you think I’d be a total bitch?” I plaster a grin on my face and beam up at him.
Sean lifts his hand to my sweat-soaked brow and then places a gentle kiss there. When he pulls away he smiles down at me. “Well, the woman sitting next to us in the childbirth class said some sobering things when you were in the ladies room.”
“I was always in the ladies room.”
“I know. I assumed they had an ice cream truck in there or something.” He arches a brow at me and reconsiders. “Cupcake machine?”
I snort a light laugh and nod. “Considering that was a pregnancy class, you’d think someone would have provided nourishment.”
“Pickles and pork chops?”
My face scrunches up. “Ewe, no! Cupcakes, Sean. And ice cream. Great, now I want ice cream and pork chops. Thanks for that.” He leans in and kisses my brow again.
“I’ll get you a cupcake machine for our bedroom.” He’s joking, but my face lights up so much that I think it may really be there when I get home.
