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‘And why is it that men see love as a means to an end?’ Her voice filled with bitterness. ‘You try answering me that, David Kane, then I’ll try answering your question!’
‘You’re not talking about love, though, Beth. You’re talking about sexual desire, a powerful weapon in the wrong hands.’ He sipped the coffee, his eyes like steel. ‘Don’t ever confuse the two. Men can be just as foolish under the influence of love, believe me.’
‘That sounds like experience talking.’ Beth picked up her own cup, chilled by the starkness on his face.
‘It would be unlikely that I could reach the age of thirty without being stung by Cupid’s arrow at some time.’ He drank his coffee, faint amusement on his face, but Beth wasn’t fooled. It would be easy to typecast David as the typical bachelor with a string of eager willing women at his disposal. Heaven knew she’d taken enough phone calls these past weeks to back that theory to the hilt. But every so often she would catch a glimpse of something in his face and realise that wasn’t the case at all. What had happened in David’s past? She wished she knew and yet, contrarily, hoped that she would never find out. She couldn’t afford to get involved in his affairs when she had so many problems of her own.
She got up, suddenly anxious to change the subject. ‘I imagine you’re right. It would be strange. I’ll make that toast now so how many slices do you want?’
‘Just one, if you’re sure you don’t mind. I don’t want to get too used to having you waiting on me, otherwise it will come as a nasty shock when you leave.’
Was that a subtle hint despite what he’d said? Her hands trembled as she cut slices off the loaf, but she tried her hardest to keep the fear from her voice. ‘I have been looking for somewhere else to live, David, but so far I’ve not found anywhere suitable. Either they’re too expensive or too run-down, but I am really trying, I assure you.’
‘I didn’t mean that! Dammit, Beth, have I asked you to find somewhere else? Well, have I? You know very well that I told you that you could stay here as long as you wanted to.’
He sounded so angry that her voice wavered. ‘I…I know that but I thought maybe…well, that maybe you had decided it wasn’t working out.’
‘It’s working just fine. Better than I could have anticipated. And the last thing I expect is that you should go traipsing the streets in your condition.’ His eyes dropped to the faint swell of her stomach and Beth felt heat warm her cheeks as she became immediately conscious of the button at the top of her trousers which she’d had to leave unfastened to accommodate her increasing waistline.
She turned away, busying herself with putting the bread into the toaster. She still hadn’t come to terms completely with her pregnancy, still hadn’t fully accepted that she was carrying a child. She could see the gradual changes in her body—the thickening of her waistline, the increased fullness of her breasts—and they embarrassed her. Maybe it would have been different if Andrew had been free to marry her. Then she would have felt proud that their love had created this child, but all she could feel as yet was a sense of guilt.
‘Let’s have no more talk about you looking for a flat, eh? You are welcome here for as long as you choose to stay. Understand?’
She nodded, keeping her face averted. ‘Yes. Thank you, but it still doesn’t seem fair that you should be inconvenienced because of my stupid mistake.’
‘Leave me to worry about being inconvenienced or not. And as for it being your mistake…’ He broke off, obviously trying to curb an uncharacteristic flash of anger. ‘From where I’m standing it seems that Andrew is the one who made the biggest mistake by lying to you, and I’m damned sure he hasn’t lost a night’s sleep over it all!’
Minutes before she had been the one berating Andrew, yet now it stung to hear David say such things. ‘How do you know? You’re passing judgement when you have no idea how he feels! Maybe he wanted to contact me, but felt that it would be kinder to leave well alone.’
‘Kinder? He lied to you, used you, and then abandoned you, and you think he’s been kind? Didn’t I say that love makes a woman blind?’ He picked up the cup and drained the coffee from it, then looked back at her with contempt. ‘You need to sort out exactly what you feel for Andrew, and to do that you have to stop fooling yourself into thinking that he cares a jot about you because frankly, Beth, from where I’m standing there’s little evidence of it!’
