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‘And how does she feel about you being here now, trying to find your birth mother?’
‘She understands. She’s adopted herself—I think that’s why she was able to raise me without blaming me for the sins of my birth mother. She knows what the urge to find out who you really are is like.’
Her mum had encouraged Amy’s quest to learn all there was to know about Agon. She’d been the one to take her to the library to seek out books on Agon and Minoan culture and to record any television documentary that featured the island. So encouraging had she been that a part of Amy had been scared her mum wanted her to go to Agon and stay there. She’d been afraid that she wanted to get rid of the living proof of her husband’s infidelity, that all the love she had bestowed on Amy had only been an act.
But Amy couldn’t deny that she’d seen the apprehension in her mum’s eyes when she’d left for Agon. Since she’d been on the island she’d received more daily calls and messages than she had when she’d first left home for university. Was she secretly worried that Amy would abandon her for Neysa...?
Secretly worried or not, wanting to get rid of her or not, being adopted herself meant her mum had first-hand experience of knowing what it was like to feel a part of you was missing. Helios had always known exactly who he was. There hadn’t been a single day of his life when he hadn’t known his place in the world or his destiny.
‘She sounds like a good woman.’
‘She is. She’s lovely.’ And she was. Loving and selfless. Amy knew her fears were irrational, but she had no control over them. They were still there, taunting her, in the deepest recesses of her mind.
‘So why do you want to meet your birth mother?’ Helios asked, puzzled that Amy could want anything to do with someone who’d caused such pain and destruction. ‘She abandoned you and destroyed your mum’s trust.’
She looked away. ‘I don’t want a relationship with her. I just... I want to know what she looks like. Do I look like her? Because the only thing I’ve inherited from my dad is his nose. And I want to know why she did what she did.’
‘Even if the truth hurts you?’ If her birth mother was anything like her layabout son, he would guess she’d abandoned Amy for purely selfish reasons.
‘I’ve been hurt every day of my life since I learned the truth of my conception,’ she said softly. ‘I know there are risks to meeting her, but I can’t spend the rest of my life wondering.’
‘Has your father not been able to fill in any of the gaps for you?’
‘Not really. He doesn’t like to talk about her—he’s still ashamed of his behaviour. He’s a scientist, happily stuck in a laboratory all day, and what he did was completely out of character.’ She gave a sad smile. ‘Even if he did want to talk about it there’s not much for him to say. He hardly knew her. She was hired on a recommendation from one of Dad’s colleagues who left his research company before I was dumped on him. All he and my mum knew was that Neysa—my birth mother—was from Agon and had come to England for a year to improve her English.’
And so the Greens had allowed a stranger into their home, with no foreknowledge of the havoc that would be wreaked on them.
‘Everything else I’ve learned since I came here,’ she added wistfully. ‘Greta has helped me.’
But she hadn’t confided in him or approached him for help.
Helios tried to imagine the pain and angst she’d been living with during all the nights they’d shared together. She hadn’t breathed a word of it, although she must have known he was in the best position to help her.
‘How’s your parents’ marriage now?’
Amy shrugged. ‘When it all happened I was still a newborn baby. They patched their marriage up as best they could for the sake of us kids. They seem happy. I don’t think my dad ever cheated again, but who knows?’
‘My mother was a good woman too,’ he said.
He was realising that Amy was right in her assertion that they had both kept things hidden. Both of them had kept parts of their lives locked away. And now it was time to unlock them.
‘And my father was also a philanderer. But, unlike your father, mine never showed any penitence. The opposite, in fact.’
Her taupe eyes widened a touch but she didn’t answer, just waited for him to continue in his own time.
‘My father was hugely unfaithful—to be honest, he was a complete bastard. And my mother was incredibly jealous. To shut her up when she questioned him about his infidelities he would hit her. She deserved better than him.’
