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“No, it’s fine.” Scrambling off his lap, I worked at calming my racing heart as I walked quietly over to the door.
“Paisley,” Brett warned, and suddenly he was off the couch and behind me.
When I looked through the peephole, my breath caught and I stumbled back a step into his arms.
“Christ, who is it?” He kept one arm around me, pulling me back as he stepped forward to look through the hole. His head jerked back when the knocking got louder, and I didn’t blame him. If you didn’t know Eli, he was terrifying to look at, and it sounded like he was a few knocks away from breaking down my door. “Do we need to call the cops or something?”
“No. He’s my—well, he’s my best friend.”
Brett’s eyebrows drew together, and he pointed at the door. “Is this Eli?”
I nodded at the same time Eli’s rough voice came from the other side. “Paisley, please. I know you’re here, I need to talk to you.”
Brett looked confused, but didn’t say anything else. He knew about my best friend, but he had no idea about the conversation I’d had with him two weeks ago. He had no idea I’d been in love with him for a dozen years.
He also had no idea we’d had a falling out. Because if Eli were still my best friend, he wouldn’t be sitting there pounding on my door. He would’ve used his key and walked right in.
“I’ll, uh, give you a moment?”
I nodded and watched Brett walk over to the coffee table to grab his cup before moving toward the kitchen. With a deep breath in, I unlocked and opened the door.
“Paisley,” Eli breathed, and everything in me ached. I instantly wanted to cry all over again just looking at him. “God, Pay, I’m so sorry.”
“It has been two weeks,” I gritted out.
Eli seemed to hunch in on himself, and his face showed an exhaustion I couldn’t begin to imagine. “I know, and I’m sorry. I just got back from Texas last night after being there for a week, and I couldn’t let myself call you once I realized everything. Because I knew the second I heard your voice I would say it all, and you need to hear this in person.”
He started to walk inside, so I moved around the door and mostly shut it behind me so I was blocking his way. Eli’s brows drew together, and I just shook my head. “It’s really not a good time right now.”
It took a few seconds before understanding crossed his features. “He’s here? Did he stay the night?” His chest’s movements got more exaggerated, and his blue eyes narrowed.
Eli was about to explode.
“I think you should go.”
“Did. He. Stay.”
“You don’t have the right to know that anymore, Eli. You made this decision. You decided there wouldn’t be anything between us, and then you threw our friendship away.”
His face softened and he stepped closer. “I never wanted to throw our friendship away, Pay. You’re my best friend; you always will be. The thought of losing you kills me. I haven’t talked to you because I thought you wouldn’t want to hear from me after that, and I didn’t even know what to say to you. I felt like the biggest kind of asshole and I didn’t know how to face you after what I’d put you through for years. But, Paisley, I don’t regret any of that nearly as much as I regret not realizing I was in love with you long before now.”
My lips parted on a nearly inaudible gasp, and the ache inside me grew at hearing Eli say those words. Words I had been craving from him for twelve years.
His large hands cupped my cheeks and tilted my head back to look at him. “I love you, Paisley Morro. I’m
in love with you. I can’t lose you.”
I’d wanted this, waited for this, and dreamt about this day for years. But after talking with Jason and Kristen . . . after two weeks of nothing from him . . . I couldn’t tell if the passion and honesty in his voice was sincere, or something my mind was making up. As much as it killed me, I shook my head and stepped away from his grasp.
“You’re just saying that because you want your wingman back, Eli. I can’t be her anymore. I’m sorry.”
“Paisley—”
“Please, go home.” Stepping into my apartment, I shut and locked the door, and stood there for long seconds as I tried to compose myself. When I turned around, Brett was standing a few feet away watching me, and I knew from his expression that he’d heard every word. “I guess I should explain that,” I whispered.
With a sad smile, he nodded and turned to follow me to the couch, then sat stiffly as he waited for the story.
September 20, 2013
