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And he knew it.
But I didn’t move, even when he leaned in to whisper, “Don’t ever forget this, Kieran. Don’t ever forget that everyone in your path might be there because they’re loyal to me.”
I gave a stiff nod, then asked, “Are you satisfied yet?” I lifted my glare to his. “She said there was nothing. That you’re paranoid. Are you fucking satisfied yet?”
“Not even close.”
“Then tell me, Mickey. The ones who betrayed you . . . who are they loyal to?” I forced a challenging smirk and slipped from the room when his victorious grin fell and was replaced with rage.
I’d gone on a rampage when Lily left. Destroyed anything she left behind. Trained longer. Pushed myself harder. All while plotting my revenge on four men.
When Jessica left? I’d sat there, unable to move until Mickey’s call had forced me out of my agony.
Only for him to deliver a devastating blow.
I should’ve known. I should’ve fucking known it was her all along.
I’d had my suspicions in the beginning. I’d thought of her as a wraith and the man Mickey hired as a ghost. But I’d never thought the man I was looking for was the girl in my bed. I should’ve followed my intuition.
I should’ve known when Beck told me that he only ever saw her on the estate if she wanted him to . . . and suddenly I was seeing her constantly.
This afternoon, I’d been sure she would disappear like the wraith she was.
And it had wrecked me. Obliterated me.
After leaving Mickey’s office, something in me knew Jessica would come back to Holloway. To see if she’d succeeded in destroying me. To gloat. To pretend. To search for more information that she’d never find because Mickey wasn’t satisfied. She’d be back. But I couldn’t stand to see her there. Not again.
But even with all the lies and deceit, I knew her enough to know there was one place she would always return to. And I knew how to wait. I was ready for her.
I wasn’t sure if I was disappointed or relieved when I heard the door to her empty trailer open and shut just a few hours after I snuck in.
Because I had an idea where she’d been—what she’d been doing. And it fucking killed me.
But the girl who’d buried herself so deep within me was just feet from me, and the part of me that couldn’t grasp the lies needed to pull her into my arms.
I wanted her to tell me that what I’d heard was wrong—that Mickey had created it. But it was her voice.
Her weighted sigh could be heard from the front and hit me like a punch to the gut. But I didn’t move from where I stood in the darkened corner of her room.
I listened as her bag fell to the floor and her light steps sounded down the hall, my breaths getting more uneven the closer she came.
“Tell me it’s not true,” I begged softly once she was in the room.
She inhaled sharply and her head snapped in my direction, her eyes narrowing to try to see me. “You shouldn’t be here.”
I huffed. “You’re one to talk.” I forced myself to breathe, then repeated, “Tell me it’s not true.”
“What’s not true?”
A dark laugh sounded in my chest. “You have to ask?”
Even from where I was, I could see her perfectly from the moonlight shining through her window. The way her throat moved with her forced swallow. The way she began nervously biting on her lip.
“You know what I am. You already know my brother’s a cop.” She lifted a shoulder in a quick jerk of a shrug. “There’s a lot you know about me and a lot you don’t. So where should I begin?”
I stepped from the shadows, my brow pulled tight as I slowly moved closer. “I want to know what you’ve done for Mickey.”
Her shoulders dropped, and she smacked at the switch on the wall. The room flooded with light and I had to force myself not to take her in. Her face. Her clothes. Every man’s fantasy, and everything that screamed where she’d just been.
