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Beck huffed and sat back in his chair. “For the first time in my life, I’m having a hard time believing you.” His eyes dragged to me, and in them I saw both pain and defeat.
Then something like a challenge flashed across his face so fast I almost missed it. I didn’t understand what it meant, but somehow, something in me knew that it meant everything terrible. And it made me feel hot and cold all at once.
No. No, he can’t . . .
Kieran sighed and started to speak, but Beck quickly said, “Jess should do it.” He cocked his head to look at Kieran. “She’s not being watched. I know better than anyone how easily she can get in and out of places without being seen. She should follow Mickey and find the ghost.”
No.
Beck’s wrecked stare met me again. And again, there was that challenge. “Jess?”
The thought of going anywhere near that man made me lightheaded. Made a rock settle in my stomach.
The room suddenly changed. Shifted. It felt cold, like Death himself was standing in the corner.
Or beside me.
Deep down, I could feel something in me responding to it. That crazed need bubbling up inside.
Make it go away.
My gaze shifted to where Kieran was holding himself unnaturally still. By the time I realized he wasn’t breathing, a consuming laugh was shaking my body and falling from my lips. Almost completely silent.
Make it go away.
“Someone’s about to go boom,” I whispered, and felt my lips stretch into a wide, teasing grin.
Kieran’s hand shot out to grip my shoulder. The touch was pleading and soothing despite how he was now trembling.
“Don’t,” he begged in a low, grating tone.
“How’s that darkness feel, Nightshade?” I whispered, swaying lightly as I bit back another round of laughter. “How’s it taste?”
Kieran’s hand moved at an achingly slow pace from my shoulder to the base of my throat then higher until he was cradling my jaw and his thumb was brushing over my mouth.
Make it go away.
I looked up into his piercing green eyes when he echoed, “Don’t.”
I’d never felt closer to death.
I’d never felt more alive.
This had to be what it felt like to be high.
This had to be what it felt like to have that rush flood your veins until you were overwhelmed with it.
No wonder people sold their souls to experience it again and again.
I would give everything to have this forever.
Weak.
His hand slid to my chest until only the tips of his lethal fingers were brushing against me, and then his touch was gone.
My body sagged from the loss of his touch. From my revelation.
It felt like a dark, disgusting weight had vanished.
