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The fuck . . .
Even with all I’d realized in the last week, it didn’t change that I’d spent my life thinking she was my future. It didn’t change that I’d spent years wondering when the day would come that she would tell me she was pregnant with my child.
Lily was no longer mine. I knew that. I felt it in my blood. But I wasn’t prepared for the shock and ache of hearing Lily was expecting someone else’s child.
I finally forced my stare from the ground to Beck, watching him lift his chin in defiance.
“I go see her every other week at the café. Saw her this morning.”
“Then you didn’t fucking lose her,” I said through clenched teeth, unable to hide my hurt or anger at his deception.
A harsh, mocking laugh left him. “Trust me. I lost her the same as you did. She has her new friends. Her new family.” One of his hands dropped to his stomach. “A little bump right here that she touches constantly. And I’ve never seen her happier.”
I wanted to remind him that she’d made her choice and he’d agreed to allow that choice. Agreed to leave her alone—the way every Holloway member had vowed to.
I should’ve known he’d go around it to see her just as I’d gone around it when I’d still planned to kill Dare.
“So, how about that?” he growled. “Does it feel like that?”
“I don’t know,” I said in a detached voice. “But that? I’d never do that shit to you.”
Without another word, I turned and disappeared into the shadows.
I looked anxiously down the street, my hands twisting the strap of my bag as I silently begged for one to hurry and the others not to show.
Then again, I don’t know why I bothered looking. I doubted I’d see Kieran until he was directly in front of me.
As much as I’d hated leaving him, I’d needed to. Needed to do this to take care of Momma and me.
He wouldn’t have understood.
He would’ve tried to put an end to it.
And this . . . there was no putting an end to this.
My stomach clenched when the car rolled to a stop at the curb, but I didn’t let it show.
I fought back the nausea and fear and hate.
Head up.
Shoulders back.
Lips twisted.
Eyes laughing.
I pushed from the wall I’d been leaning against and danced toward the car that waited for me, making one last sweep along the street with my eyes as I did.
No assassin.
No black SUV.
I popped open the passenger door and slid into the car, my lip curled when I turned to the driver. “Oh, how I’ve dreamt of all the ways to kill you since I last saw you.”
His eyes raked over me, a breathy laugh punching from his chest. “Ah, little Jess Michaels.”
“The little was disgusting when I was little. It’s worse now because I’m sure you still picture me that way.”
