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slowly dropped from her face down her body, and settled on her waist. My hands curled and the tips of my fingers tingled, and I had the strongest urge to pull her against me again.
I flexed my hand and mentally shook my head, and told myself it was because I wasn’t used to having someone who didn’t throw herself at me. But when I looked back up and noticed the way her eyes kept darting over to Graham, and how her cheeks filled with heat, my hand curled into a fist. Irritation flashed through me, and something white-hot settled in my stomach and pulsed through my veins, just as it had the night before when I’d seen Graham dancing with her. I didn’t understand it, and I didn’t like it.
And I needed to stop thinking about the way her body had felt against mine.
Before I knew I was moving, I was out of the booth and following her as she walked away to get our drinks.
“Charlie Girl,” I murmured when she slowed at the POS to enter in the drink order.
She faltered for a second, but she didn’t turn to look at me, and her voice was calm when she asked, “Why are you following me?”
“Is that really how people see me?”
She looked over her shoulder, her brow pinched and eyes full of confusion.
“Unapologetic and arrogant,” I clarified.
“And unaware,” she added softly.
“Of what?”
“Exactly.” Her eyes bored into mine for long seconds before she spoke. “Deacon, why are you asking me this?”
“Because I need to know if that’s what people see when they see me.”
“Isn’t that how you want people to see you?” She looked down again to punch our drinks into the screen, and when she finished, she just stood there. She didn’t have to look to know that I hadn’t left. With a sigh, she turned, already speaking as she did. “You’ve created this image, Deacon. The three of you did. Knox got out of it, but that was different because he’d had Harlow before any of you ever became—well, the way you are.”
“And what’s that?” I asked, my tone slightly taunting, mostly curious to see if she would say it to my face.
Charlie’s cheeks blazed red, her head shook slightly. “You sleep with every legal female close enough to touch—”
“Not every.”
“—and you brag about it. You act like no one can touch you. And if you hurt any of those women, you don’t care. It isn’t in you to care.”
I lifted an eyebrow and reminded her, “I cared about hurting you.”
“That’s different, Deacon. You would also care about hurting Grey or Harlow or Knox’s sister.”
I had never fantasized about touching any of them though. And I still didn’t know what to do about wanting to touch the girl in front of me.
“So to answer your question, yes, that’s how people see you. But I think that’s only because you created this for them to see. And I also think that you have deep and confusing thoughts when you’re going off little sleep. That, or one of the girls from last night made you think about who you are far too much. Which . . . actually might be a good thing for you. Maybe she’ll be a change for you, like Harlow was for Knox. But go sit down and I’ll bring your coffee regardless of whichever one it was.”
I bit back my automatic response, because, technically, she wasn’t wrong, and blew out a heavy sigh as I took a step back. Before she could turn away, I asked, “Why does it have to depend on a girl? Why can’t there just be different sides to me?”
“Such deep and confusing thoughts,” she murmured again. “Why are you coming to me with this?”
“Because I’ve seen different sides of you in just the last week. I’ve seen the shy, sweet Charlie I grew up with, and I’ve seen the one who stood up to me and for herself.”
Embarrassment flashed across her face. “You can’t compare us, Deacon. All you’ve ever wanted was to be seen, and I’d rather not be seen at all.” She walked away, leaving me there, staring at the place where she’d been standing.
Just as I turned, she called out my name, and I looked over my shoulder to see her walking back toward me with a mug of coffee in her hands.
“Here, so you can get started.” She smirked, but it died as soon as I took the mug from her hands. “And, Deacon? Keith might be sleeping right now, but he repeats everything, and he’s obsessed with you lately. Keep that in mind when you talk about your nights, okay?”
I’d never realized how much people expected me to have a night with a random girl, or multiple girls, until this week. I’d also never realized how much this image that Charlie said I’d created for myself would piss me off when I found that I could no longer get away from it.
I huffed in frustration, and stared into the dark depths of the coffee for a moment before looking up at her again. “Would you believe me if I told you that I was alone last night?”
