“What?”
“Why are you trying to convince me that he likes me when he just disappeared. Because of me. Because he doesn’t want to see me.” I lowered my head, realizing that my eyes were watering.
“He went through a lot.”
“No! No. It doesn’t work that way.” I bit my lip.
Frid swore under her breath and looked at the mountains.
“We’re going for a walk. Would you like to join us?” She finally asked, but I only shook my head, “Alright. Alright. See you later.” Frid sighed and I returned back to the house.
When Frid and Victor left and the sounds of their voices disappeared into the distance, I slowly walked into the house. Unable to stay still, I picked up the rag I used for dusting the surfaces and leaned against the window seal, pressing my forehead to the cold surface of the glass. Tears rolled down my cheeks, giving me much needed relief. It was the first time I could express how I felt without the prying eyes of Tynan’s friends.
A sudden knock on the door made me nearly jump. Anxiously, I dried my cheeks with the sleeve of my dress, expecting to see Frid or Victor returning.
It was not Frid or Victor, and my heart swelled with anticipation, then ached with disappointment when the massive figure of Sol stepped through the threshold.
“Where are they?” he asked.
“They went for a walk. If you hurry, you can still catch them,” I said.
“No, I would probably interfere with something,” Sol trailed off.
“Probably.” I attempted a smile and resumed my work.
Sol made himself comfortable on the couch and picked up one of Grace’s books. I bit my lip returning to my thoughts.
“You know, it’s so strange to return after all these years,” Sol observed.
“Yes?” I responded just to be polite.
“Yes. We were forced out when we chose to be Shadows for the council,” Sol continued.
“Why did you do it then?” I asked.
“Things were different back then. We were the kids of the rebels, no one wanted to deal with us. We were all by ourselves most of our childhoods. Frid was an orphan and Victor and Ty lost their dads when they were executed for treason.”
I sat down in one of the chairs forgetting about my work.
“Yeah, it was never easy to be here before the rebellion, but after, it was ten times harder. We were starving here. My aunt was in poor health back then and relying on the clan for support, I could not take things from her. I don’t know what would have happened to us if not for Tynan, he fed us for months. And the things he had to go through to provide for us.” Sol stretched out his legs, trying to get comfortable. “His family was always messed up. His old man was never there for them. He took a wife from a very respectable family, but she had issues. She was very violent. I know that’s not what you usually expect from women, but she was bloodthirsty, wild. She orchestrated the coup, feeding lies about the superiority of our clan. Our family tried to overthrow the Red Queen and lost. Not one clan joined the fight. Tynan’s father was executed in the end, but his wife stayed and ruled the clan. And she got much worse over the years.
You know, the competition that you saw the other day,it’s open to everyone to participate, but Tynan was forced to enter every couple of months after he turned ten.”
My hand flew to my mouth, I could not help a light gasp escaping my lips.
“We only started to participate so he would have contestants his age. What he had to endure... being beaten up and humiliated in front of everybody... And she would just watch, she had a weakness for other people’s pain, especially his.
There were rumors that he was not her child, that Tynan’s dad brought him home from one of his trips and she was forced to name him her own. I don’t know if that was true, but she did not treat Quirin and Hanoch the same way.
I think she forced him to participate because at some point she realized that he was getting way too strong to punish him herself. I’m assuming you have seen his scars. He never talks about it, but I know, I know everything. I saw the fresh scars appear methodically over the years.
I think things got a little better when Gabrielle appeared. She and Tynan were inseparable for a while. But that girl was bad news. We knew, we all saw it. But he had had nothing for so long. Who could tell him that the only person that kept him going was shallow and selfish?
Anyway, it lasted for some time. She was all into him, they were going to marry. Glad that did not happen. Well, she was all about Tynan, but only until she found someone better.”
I sat still, not realizing that tears rolled down my cheeks, my hands clenched the rag I was still holding in my fist.
“I don’t think it’s easy for him to believe that someone can accept him the way he is. Even now, with us, he feels that he needs to protect us, as if that’s the only reason we stay.
