AllFreeNovel
Share Us
CHAPTER FOURTEEN – SHELBY
Everyone Needs Their Own Space
I was never drinking again.
I swear. That was a promise. It wasn’t going to happen. Never, ever again, not after what I’d done last night.
I’d kissed Jay.
Freakin’ kissed him.
Why had I gone in for the cheek? Why had I done something so silly? I never kissed his cheek. I’d only ever done it on birthdays and Christmas to say thank you for the presents. I’d never done it before bed.
What was wrong with me?
And I’d told him one of the voices wanted to have sex with him and that the voice was mine.
I was so glad he hadn’t made me breakfast like he’d originally said. I couldn’t begin to imagine the conversation.
Morning, Jay, I’m sorry for accidentally kissing you and telling you I wanted to have sex with you.
I rested my forehead against the fridge and groaned. My phone rang, and I reluctantly moved to get it. Brie’s name flashed on the screen.
“Hey,” I answered.
“Wow, what’s wrong with you?” she said instantly.
“Nothing. What’s up?”
“I just took lunch to Sean at the gym because I was out getting mine and Jay was miserable as hell. Sean said he’d been like it all morning. Do you know what’s up with him?”
I groaned, sliding onto one of the island stools. “Me. It’s me.”
“What’s you? What did you do? Did you finally have enough of him and tell him to move out?”
“No. I kissed him.”
The sound of choking came down the line, followed by a big wheeze.
“Brie? Are you okay?”
“You kissed him?” she rasped after a second. “Why did you do that?”
“It was an accident!” I snapped.
“Whoa, okay,” Brie said. “Calm down.”
I took a deep breath and let it back out again. “You’re right. I’m sorry. I’m just super stressed over it.”
“Okay. What happened?”
“We went for dinner at his parents’ last night. I had wine with his mom and Grams, and I was a little tipsier than I thought. He helped me into my room, and when I went to kiss his cheek goodnight, he turned, and I caught his lips.”
“Oh, shit. That’s not awkward at all.”
“Yeah, well before that, I’d already told him that the voices inside my head wanted to have sex, but it wasn’t a fictional voice, it was my voice.”
“So you told your best friend you want to have sex and then kissed him. You’re a mess, Shelby.”
“I know.” I slumped forward on the island, raking my fingers through my hair. “What do I do, Brie?”
“Why don’t you just tell him how you feel?”
“No way. Last night can be written off because of the wine, but telling him I have feelings for him can’t be ignored.” I got back up and opened the fridge for the orange juice. “We have to live together. If I tell him I have feelings for him, it’s going to be awkward. I know he doesn’t feel that way about me.”
“Do you? He’s pretty damn moody. Just grunted at me when I said hi. Maybe he does have feelings for you.”
I shook my head even though she couldn’t see it. “He doesn’t. It was weird after. If he had feelings, he wouldn’t have pulled away, would he?”
“Maybe he pulled away because you were drinking and it was an accident.”
“I don’t know. I’m kinda hoping we can just forget it ever happened.”
Brie blew out a breath that crackled down the line. “I don’t know. You didn’t see him today. I don’t think forgetting is an option.”
“But I want to forget.”
“That’s not how it works.”
“I don’t care. I want to forget it happened, so we’re not going to talk about it.”
“What if Jay wants to talk about it?”
“Then he can talk about it. It doesn’t mean I’m going to reply.”
She was silent for a moment. “You’re hard work, do you know that?”
“I’m familiar with hard work. I washed my hair this morning. Drying it was a bitch.” I paused. “I know you’re right and that I have to talk to him about it, but I’m not going to admit that I have a crush on him.”
“Fine. It’s your funeral if he ever finds out you were lying, especially if he feels the same way.”
“He doesn’t feel the same.”
“You don’t know unless you ask.”
“Brie, I love you, but that’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. If I’m not going to tell him I have a crush on him, then I’m not going to ask him if he has one on me.”
I practically heard her rolling her eyes.
“Okay, okay. I get it. It’s hard now that you’re living together, but maybe you can’t ignore this forever. And think about it—if he shares your feelings, you don’t have to deal with the hoopla of moving in together.”
“But if we ever broke up, we’d be living together.”
“A slight complication,” she admitted. “Just… Brush it off, then. Pretend it’s no big deal, and eventually one of you will move on—probably him, since you only venture outside for food—and then you’ll hate yourself for never telling him while he’s marrying some hot other woman and you’re cut out of his life, because a pretty, single female friend would be threatening to his new wife.”
