I end our exchange on a friendly note. If he feels this way, surely he’ll be a better father than Nelson. But an internal voice cautions me to be realistic. He still hasn’t said a word about the OB-GYN appointment. Of course, coming to that wouldn’t make him a good father, but it still hurts that he wants to minimize his involvement.
If he felt that the baby was his, why didn’t he say something about seeing Dr. Silverman? Even if he couldn’t come while he’s in London, he could’ve shownsomething—concern, curiosity…even excitement at the possibility of hearing the baby’s heartbeat.
I stew over Huxley’s confusing reaction for the rest of the morning, but can’t figure out how hetrulyfeels. I call Adam during my lunch break to apologize for Huxley’s behavior.
“Ah, don’t worry about it.” Adam is gracious as usual. “It was nothing. But are you okay?” His voice turns soft with concern.
“Yeah, I think so.” I put a hand over my belly.I have to be okay and stay strong for the baby’s sake.It can’t really count on anyone but me.
He hesitates. “So. Are we still friends?”
“Of course.” I force a bright smile, hoping it reaches my voice. “Why wouldn't we be?”
“Well, you know. Sometimes when people think a friend is in the way of a romantic relationship, they dump the friend.”
My heart softens. He must’ve been worried after that horribly possessive display from Huxley. “Adam, I would never do that to you. You’ve been my best friend ever since I came to L.A.” He stayed even when I couldn’t afford to go out like I used to.
A pause. “Okay. I’m glad.”
“Are we good?” As the question slips from my lips, my eyes land on the desktop calendar with a red circle around today. The OB-GYN appointment. Huxley can’t go because of his business trip. But if he hadn’t been so callous when I asked him if he wanted to come with me—or if he had mentioned something about the appointment after the paternity test result landed on his phone—my heart might not feel so heavy.
“Of course. But are you sure you’re okay? You sighed seven times.”
I blink. “I did?”
“Yeah.”
I bite back an eighth sigh. I guess I’m more upset about going alone to the upcoming appointment than I thought.
“What’s wrong? Come on. You can tell me.”
“Well…” I clear my throat, doing my best not to sigh again. “My respect for my mom seems to grow each day. I don’t know how she had me on her own. It must’ve taken so much courage.”
“But you have your husband.” Adam sounds a little choked up. Despite his sharky legal mind, he can get really sentimental. “And you have me. You aren’t alone.”
“He won’t go to the OB-GYN appointments with me. I told him we could hear baby’s heartbeat for the first time, but he wasn’t interested. Too busy to be bothered. And now he’s in London.”
“I’ll go with you,” Adam says instantly.
“Aren’t you busy?”
“So? You’re my friend, and this is important to you. I’ll make the time.”
“But it’s today at three.”
“Okay. I can take work home.”
A little lump clogs my throat, and tears spring to my eyes. “You’re thebestbest friend, Adam.”
“I know.” His sigh sounds a little wistful. “Don’t forget, I’ll always be here for you.”
* * *
Dr. Silverman’s office is on the third floor of a sleek high-rise. She apparently moved, and Elizabeth told me the new location is much more convenient if you’re coming from the foundation. The office décor is soothing, with lots of sage and light yellow. Books for children line the lower shelves, while pamphlets and titles for women’s health occupy the upper ones. There are posters for regular pap smears and breast cancer screenings on the walls, and several hand sanitizer dispensers on the tables and reception counter.
The reception area is empty except for a couple of women and the receptionist. It’s apparently Dr. Silverman’s philosophy to not keep patients waiting for long. Adam isn’t there when I arrive. Mild disappointment unfurls, but I shouldn’t be upset. Although he’s always been there for me, I’ve never imposed on him without any notice before. It’s possible he got caught up in something.
I put a hand over my belly.It doesn’t matter.I’m here alone, which I expected ever since Huxley sent that curt text, sounding annoyed that he might have to waste precious time on something as inconsequential as a baby.
