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He didn’t say anything.
“I want to figure it out. I want to know how I feel about you for real, but all the issues we’ve ever had have been because we didn’t talk. I don’t want…” I took a deep breath. “I don’t want that to happen again. Even if the way I feel right now is just because it’s you—”
“I know. I get it.” He brought his hands up to my face and cupped it. “I know, Rae. And I don’t want to pressure you into figuring anything out. I really don’t. Do I want you back? Yes. I’m not gonna lie to you, babe. I wish you could look me in the eye right now and tell me that you want to give us another try, but I’m not going to force you into any decisions right now.”
I nodded, swallowing hard.
“But I’m not gonna change how I am with you. This is the only way I know how to be with you. I’m not gonna stop messing with you. I’m gonna fuck with you until you have no choice but to kiss me to shut me up.” His lips twitched.
“You’re a giant pain in the ass, Chase Aarons.”
“I know. But so are you, and here I am.” He winked, brushing his thumbs over my cheeks. “But, in case you need any help to decide how you feel…”
I knew what he was going to do before his lips touched mine. I knew he was going to kiss me because that was the one thing he could do. It was the only tool he had at his disposal to change my mind, to influence how I felt, to help me clear up the mess of emotions that swirled inside me.
Kissing me was the only thing he could do, and I’d bet all my money that he did it because he wanted to.
He kissed me like he needed to. His fingers dove into my hair and his lips moved across mine with expert moves. Seconds passed as he just kissed me, and with every second that did I understood just how he felt about me a little more.
It was the same as before.
Two years, bad decisions, hatred, anger, arguments—and today, I understood something.
He’d taken everything, all the anger I’d directed his way, all the fights we’d had and the insults I’d hurled his way. Yet, through it all, Chase loved me the way people loved in movies.
Unabashedly, unashamedly, unconditionally.
And as he curled his fingers around the back of my neck, slowly pulling away just to keep the contact between our lips as long as possible, my heart skipped a beat, warmth spreading through my veins.
I wanted to pull him back. I wanted to curl my fingers into his t-shirt and pull him back into me, to kiss him deeper and harder and longer.
But I couldn’t. Because that was emotional thinking. That was my heart and my hormones leading the charge, and if I was going to do this—if I was going to be a freaking adult and do this properly, I was going to use my head.
I wasn’t going to rush into choices.
I was lucky. Chase understood where I was. He understood there was a lot of water under the bridge, and that I was willing to wade through that water to figure it out.
As long as we were honest with each other and talked, then maybe, just maybe, we could pick up where we left off.
I wanted to remember why I fell in love with him.
I wanted to get my store back to where it should be.
I wanted to get my family sorted out.
I wanted to be happy. If I was honest with myself, that was the one thing I’d never been since we broke up. And, hey, I took full responsibility for that. It was all me. It was wrong and stupid and immature, but somehow, I really felt like there was a second chance being handed to me.
To us.
And maybe, just maybe, we could make it work.
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO – CHASE
“How many more holes?”
Rae sat at the bar counter, sipping on a tall glass of ice water. “How many little x’s are left?”
“Depends if you’re Snow White and dated a few dwarves.”
“I’m trying really hard to like you, Chase, but you’re making it difficult.”
I laughed and prodded her in the arm. “Who shut their store to help you redo yours? Even though you’ll be real competition with whatever fancy shit you’re concocting back there?”
She held up a finger. “Are we going there again? Really?”
“If I hadn’t opened there’d be nothing to close? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whatever.” I placed the tip of the drill bit on one messy little ‘x’ and started it. It whirred to life and, with a little pressure, broke through the wall and made a perfectly round hole. A quick blow into it removed all the loose dust and sent it cascading across the counter.
