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“I didn’t know you didn’t know until that day you showed up here. When he ran into you, there was no recognition on your face.”
“I never knew.” I feel like I have to say those words to this man. He’s helped me more times than I can count, gave me way too many breaks. I don’t want him thinking I abandoned my child and just walked away. “She should’ve told me.”
“I agree. She should’ve, but if I know Tinley, and I think I do, I know she was a scared young woman back then. From what I heard around school and how you acted after she left, you didn’t exactly make it easy for her to confess something so life changing.”
Of course, it would get back to him how I told her I was using her the entire time. I told it to my friends more than once before I left—drunken words from a heartbroken boy who wished things were different. Back then, I was still saving face for a crowd that had no bearing on much of my life in the two plus years I spent with that woman.
“I didn’t, and I was already gone by the time she decided I needed to know.”
“Well, we can’t change the past, but I hope you’re here to do something about the future.” There’s a challenge in his eyes when he looks up from the folder to me.
“I am, but I need to know what I’m getting myself into.”
“Does it make any difference? Does the information in this folder have the power to change anything?”
“Not a thing.”
“Then let me tell you about the kid I know, rather than the black and white of how he’s reacted to the problems in his life.”
I nod in agreement, watching as he slides the folder to the side before steepling his hands in front of him.
“Alex is a smart kid. I think he’s a little too smart for his own good. It’s made it easier to manipulate people, adults and peers alike. He’s realized a smile and a little charm go a long way. Sound like anyone you know?”
I give him a grin.
“He loves baseball. He’s actually a really good player, could be the star on the team if he didn’t get into so much trouble. University interscholastic league rules of the state make him ineligible when he’s suspended. The coach takes things a little further and benches him an extra game every time he’s sent to the office. It worked for a while, but Alex is very close to giving up.”
“Is the coach a dick?”
“Not at all. Hard on his players, yes, but Brian is one of the good guys. He wants these kids to succeed, but he can only do so much from the dugout, you know?”
I can understand what he’s saying, but tough love doesn’t always work, especially for a group of kids where tough is all they’ve ever known. Things are hard enough at home. They shouldn’t be difficult when it involves something positive that they enjoy.
“According to his records from elementary school, Alex showed up in Texas with an attitude. School is hard, kids are just mean. They all have something going on. Every one of them has a chip on their shoulder, and putting kids like that together when each one is trying to scratch their way through life makes it even harder. Alex seems to have come out on top in that regard, but he has to fight daily to stay there. There’s always another kid who is tired of being beat down and walked on. There’s always a challenge, some reason he thinks he needs to prove himself to his peers.”
“Sounds familiar,” I grumble.
“I know you don’t want to hear this, but it was the same for you. You had struggles. Cedric had struggles. Every kid has them. No disrespect, but you weren’t alone. You weren’t the only one who needed help. You’re just one of the few that was eventually willing to accept it.”
“And Alex?”
“Alex is in desperate need of assurances. He needs out of south Houston. He needs a chance to flourish where he isn’t getting into trouble. Where he doesn’t have to look over his shoulder terrified that someone is going to jump him to prove a point.”
“I know.” And I do. I want all of that for my son, but I can’t just swoop in and save the day, walk up to the kid and tell him he’s coming with me. First off, Tinley would never allow it, and as shitty as what she’s done to me, I know she’s a good mom, doing the best she can with the hand she’s been dealt. I push down the pain and anger over her lies and meet my mentor’s eyes. “How do I start?”
This man knows what it’s like to build rapport with an angry kid who has had more life experience by middle school than many adults have had.
