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He paused for a moment. ‘A child is a gift from God, Hayley.’
‘I know …’ Her sniff echoed loudly in the empty church. ‘I want this baby so much but I can’t tell Jasper.’
‘But why ever not, my dear? He’s your husband.’
She looked at him through tear-washed eyes. ‘But you know what it’s been like for him. It’s made him bitter and yet I found out today it’s not his fault.’
‘What’s not his fault?’
She took a moment to blow her nose. ‘He’s not Daniel’s father,’ she said, looking down at the scrunched-up tissues in her hand. ‘Miriam’s mother-in-law came to see me. She told me someone else is Daniel’s father. She wouldn’t say who. She and Martin Beckforth are using the information as a bribe to extort money out of Jasper. For all these years I’ve thought he was a neglectful father. I hated him for being selfish and yet he’s the most unselfish person I’ve ever met. He’s sacrificed so much for the sake of a child who he’s known all along isn’t his.’
There was another short silence.
‘Does Daniel know who his father is?’ Raymond asked.
‘No … that’s what’s so terribly upsetting.’ She turned to look at him again, blinking back tears. ‘June Beckforth doesn’t seem to care what effect it will have on Daniel to find out his father is some sort of creep or criminal.’
‘Is that what she said?’ He visibly paled with shock. ‘That the boy’s father is a criminal?’
‘No … not really …’ She chewed at her lip for a second. ‘She just said it would be a bombshell revelation. She’s even threatening to sell her story to the newspapers. I just assumed it must be someone disreputable otherwise why would Jasper want to keep it quiet for all this time? He’s trying to protect Daniel.’
‘No, he’s not,’ Raymond said heavily. ‘He’s not doing it to protect Daniel at all.’
‘He’s not?’ Hayley blinked at him in puzzlement. ‘Then who is he protecting?’
Raymond looked at her with deep sadness in his hazel eyes. ‘He’s doing it to protect me.’
‘You?’ She blinked at him again. ‘Why would he be doing it to protect you? You’re a priest, for God’s … I mean, for Pete’s sake. You deal with this sort of stuff all the time, you know people’s confessions and—’ She stopped when she saw the glimmer of tears sprout in his eyes, the sudden silence so heavy she could hear the faint flickering of the candles on the altar.
Raymond took a breath that sounded as if it hurt him deep inside and said, ‘Jasper’s doing it to protect me because I’m Daniel’s father.’
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
HAYLEY STARED AT him in a stunned silence.
Raymond got to his feet and sent a shaking hand through his thinning hair. ‘For years I have tried to forget about the one time I betrayed my promise to God. I begged Him for forgiveness and moved on. I have felt the call for the priesthood since I was a young choirboy. I didn’t want anything to stop me from achieving my goal of serving the community.’ He turned to look at her, his expression tortured with guilt. ‘I had no idea Daniel was mine. Not until this very moment. Like you I had assumed Jasper was responsible. Our father assumed it too. Everyone assumed it. And why shouldn’t they? I had rarely strayed from the straight and narrow, certainly not with the frequency Jasper did. He was in and out of trouble all the time. I made one error, but I had no idea it would have these sorts of repercussions.’
‘I don’t know what to say … This must have come as a tremendous shock to you,’ she said. ‘I’m so sorry. I had no idea. I just wanted to talk to you about my own dilemma never once suspecting you were somehow connected to it.’
‘For once in my life I don’t have the answers, Hayley,’ he said. ‘I’m the one everyone comes to for help and guidance and yet I am at a loss to know what to do. And yet I can’t help thinking of the boy. That poor young man has never known his real father.’
‘I think June and Martin Beckforth are wrong,’ Hayley said. ‘They think Daniel will be disappointed by finding out who his real father is, but I don’t agree. In fact, I can’t help wondering if he already knows. He and Jasper are very close.’
He gave her an agonised glance. ‘I have to come forward and claim him as mine. What will my parishioners think of me?’
Hayley got to her feet and gave his arm an affectionate squeeze. ‘They’ll think you’re human, Raymond, just like the rest of us. No one is perfect and certainly not all the time. If God can forgive you, then I don’t see why your parishioners can’t do so as well.’
He smiled a sad smile. ‘You’re a wise young woman, Hayley. Jasper is a very lucky man.’
‘For another few days,’ she said with a droop to her mouth. ‘He still wants our marriage to end.’
‘Then I will keep praying for a miracle,’ he said. ‘Go home to him, Hayley, and tell him about his baby. God knows I wish I had been told all those years ago about mine.’
‘Even though it might have meant you would have lost everything you held most dear?’ she asked.
‘I would have not lost as much as Jasper has done on my behalf,’ he said. ‘Our father believed the worst of him. He has been tainted with the shame of this for too long. He deserves to be free from it at last.’
‘He and Miriam did what they thought was best at the time,’ she said. ‘Jasper knew how devoted you were to your faith. He wouldn’t let anything stand in the way of your dreams.’
