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Conrad imagined his ears with a problem. What just happened had been… mind-blowing. Never had it been like this with any woman! He wanted to stay, cuddle her and repeat the session ad infinitum.
“I said leave!” Came the rather croaked arid repetition.
A glance at her, she had turned on her side, her back to him. Her body assumed an immovable quality, as if holding back unbearable tension. He sat on the bed, found his pyjamas trousers. Maybe she needed privacy. He stood up, walked to the connecting door, and opened it. As he walked through it, a sob echoed through to him. As it came from the deepest sorrow. The second one worse. He did not look back. The third one came muffled, probably by the pillow. Hundreds followed. He lost balance and his body encountered the wall by the door. His knees gave as he slid to the worn out carpet. She wept incontrollable now, the desperate whimpers punching his ears in the form of guilt and self-loath. What had he done?
She barely contained herself until he left; the dam of pain and sorrow burst in one blow. She cried all the tears she had not shed in five years. The loneliness, the apprehensions, the unhappiness threshing through her in a river of sadness. Tears kept falling abundant until sleep overcame her. Wet, exhausted and insufficient.
There would be no sleep alleviation for Conrad. When the sobs finally stanched, he remained there on the floor, head on his hands, despair overflowing.
Chapter Four
Next morning, after one of the worst nights of his life, Conrad entered the morning room for breakfast. Not that he expected Aurelia to be there, it proved to be empty, anyway. She surely had gone about her hard day’s work.
Hughes came in the room. “Lord Strafford, I have a message from Lady Strafford.”
Conrad’s heart squeezed. “Yes, Hughes.” He sat with his plate, not in the mood for food at all.
“Mrs Hutton, the school teacher, encountered a problem and Lady Strafford will substitute her.”
Conrad lifted his gaze to the butler. “School teacher?”
A rather obvious expression of pride entered the butler’s stance. “Yes, my lord. Lady Strafford established a school for the tenant’s children on the west side of the land.”
Surprise took Conrad over as he tried not to show it too much. “Indeed.”
“Mrs Hutton is the teacher. Her aunt broke her arm and she will not be coming to work for a few days to take care of her old aunt.”
“Isn’t there anyone else who can cover for this Mrs Hutton?”
“Lady Strafford said it wouldn’t be possible at such short notice.”
“Thank you, Hughes.” The butler bowed and left.
Things had changed in his estate since he left. Who would have imagined? Aurelia worrying about the children and building a school for them. He himself would never have thought about something like this. He had never given much thought to his estate, anyway. This wife of his seemed committed to the land and the people. No way of fighting the wave of admiration that erupted in his chest.
Classes had just finished, giving Aurelia a sensation of duty well accomplished. Getting out of bed to face a new day had seemed an impossible task to carry out. She woke up from a heavy dreamless sleep, her thoughts in shambles. It was as if an iron ball had fallen on her head.
Eyes puffed, a heaviness in her head and unused muscles drawing attention to them greeted her in between sheets
Not her body though. It remembered and rejoiced the lures her husband had bestowed upon it. The sensuality she had experienced the night before was completely alien to her. She had never imagined it possible that level of enjoyment. The remembrance of it made hot chills go through her. The will to taste more, experience more heated up her blood.
Her heart and mind, though, went in very deferent directions. He was the man she had had a crush on for a long time before she got married. During the country balls, her gaze followed him, adoringly. She had refused marriage offers in the hopes that one day he would notice her. Soon had she realized it to be an illusion. She did not reconcile the life she had before with this. The sorrow remained there in her heart, the pain. She did not believe in love anymore, her feelings damaged, she feared she would not be able to mend them again.
These contradictions minced her in multiple parts. She wished she escaped, broke free of these churning events, even if for a few hours. Impossible, she knew, since these feelings and thoughts accompanied her at every hour.
“Lady Strafford.” A tiny voice sounded behind her. A turn registered Bess, a six-year-old pupil, at the school’s door. She walked to her.
A smile stretched her lips. The little dark-haired, freckled girl looked up at her. “Yes, Bess.”
“I cannot find me kitten!” On the verge of tears, the little girls looked up at her with huge brown eyes.
“Where did you last see it?” She asked, crouching down to speak to the timid girl.
“In me yard, but now it gone!”
“Maybe you should wait a few hours to see if it comes back.”
“Me mum says the same, But I miss it!” Tears now fell in earnest.
