“I will be there.” He would hold on.
“Of course you will. You’remyUaithne and we will always be together.”
“We will always be together.”
They kissed again and their joy was profound. It was unstoppable, as vast and as ancient as the seas and the heavens, outlasting time. There would always be a Dagda and his Uaithne and Nox would always be tied to Nelson.
Warmth and delight radiated from Nelson’s core, growing stronger and making him lighter with every slide of theirtongues and the sounds of their softly vibrating hums. Their hands splayed and pulled as they vanquished every iota of distance between them until they were one and their hearts shared the same steady beat. A kiss became a prayer they spoke together, blessing their union and dedicating it to the universe. It made their love divine and unbreakable and Dùbhghlas was cursed for believing he could stop them.
The soft glow of Nelson’s pleasure slowly built into a bright flame until it burst into a cascade of goosebumps, leaving him giddy and gasping.
Suddenly, there was the sound of a splash as a blast of frigid water hit Nelson’s face. His mouth had been open, causing him to choke and splutter but he quickly recovered and drank and lapped at the fabric covering his face.
“Way to ruin a good dream,” he said, his teeth chattering.
But Nelson couldn’t think of a better way to wake up, in this instance, and was intensely grateful when he noticed that his body wasn’t hurting and he wasn’t hungry anymore.
Chapter Twelve
Three more days passed without any sign of Dùbhghlas or news about Nelson and it was becoming impossible to keep the voices in Nox’s head straight or know if his heart’s desires were still his own.
I could take away their light.
I could make the world as dark as my heart feels right now and let them all suffer until Nelson is returned to me.
I will break everything. I will destroy it all if I lose him.
This rage was so unnatural, yet so compelling. And it was consuming him. It made Nox queasy as he stood at the study window, his soul seeking the night for any sign of its mate. He fought so hard and sacrificed so much to defeat a god, and this was how he was rewarded? All Nox had ever wanted was his own life and the kind of love his parents had. He wanted to spreadknowledge and love and simplylive. Why was that too much to ask?
And for a god no less. Shouldn’t he have some control over his destiny? Possibly a little input? He began to hear a drumbeat around the time he started puberty and a voice that wasn’t his own whispered incessantly that one day, he would be the bearer of Tuathe—an age of glorious light. Defeating the Dagda should have meant freedom and relief but the drums grew louder and forces beyond Nox began pulling and demanding he answer a much more frightening call.
The urge to start a Hunt and rid the world of demons and monsters and assert his dominion over all the sun touched grew more powerful with each day. That godly urge was easier to ignore when Nox was with Nelson or teaching, but now, all there was was fury and fear and a deep desire for vengeance.
The world will become Hell and I will let it burn for an eternity if Nelson’s soul is defiled.
There was no telling what Hugh Dùbhghlas had done to Nelson or what the warlock was planning. Smoak had cruelly reminded Nox that Dùbhghlas was capable of killing and necromancy and could create terrifying amalgams of undead things. Dùbhghlas had made an art of trading with demons and stealing souls and Nelson’s would be too good and too pure to resist.
I will?—
“Nox. Lad?” Merlin touched his arm, shaking Nox from his thoughts. “Come away from the window. You’ve been there for close to an hour.”
Nox shook his head, still searching through the night and listening for Nelson’s voice. “I’m fine.”
“You’re crying and your hands are bleed?—”
“I said I’m fine and this is…!” Nox bit out, finally turning from the window and scowling down at his hands. He’d squeezed them so hard his nails had cut into his palms. “Do you think Nelson isn’t hurting?” he asked angrily, then gasped and reared back when his ear was flickedhard.
“Mind yourself, young man! Gather up those ugly thoughts and those vile desires and remember who you are. Remember what Nelson is and thatthis…” He flapped a hand at Nox angrily. “Thiswould notplease him. He would want no part of what you are doing and whatever it is percolating in that head of yours.”
“I know, but—!” Nox started, then pulled in a deep breath and did as Merlin commanded. He gathered up all the bitterness and rage and remembered howgoodNelson was and how much he loved Nox when he was being good. That was all that Nelson had ever asked of him and he would be disappointed if he knew how quickly Nox had cast aside their mission and his humanity. “I’m sorry.” He bowed his head and gave Merlin’s cheek an obedient kiss for good measure. “I was losing hope and venturing into someplace dark. Thank you for pulling me back.”
Merlin smiled softly, his eyes glittering with understanding and sadness. He missed Nelson almost as much as Nox did. “We’ll find him but you’ll be of no use to anyone if you don’t eat and keep up your strength,” he scolded and pointed at the soup, tea, and scones on the desk.
“I’ll try,” Nox said as he allowed Merlin to pull back the chair and obediently lowered into it. He still didn’t have a hint of an appetite but he had to keep up his strength for Nelson. And it would help his mood, Nox conceded. He lifted the spoon to his lips to taste the soup and hummed as it warmed him and reminded him of cozy, autumn evenings. “Clancy made this.”The creamy broth was scented with sage, rosemary, thyme, and truffles and there were a variety of mushroom pieces along with morsels of smoked chicken.
“Of course, he did. There’s only one meal I’m good at making but Clancy has always had a flair in the kitchen. Is it still hot enough?” Merlin asked and Nox waved him off.
“It’s perfect and I’m already feeling better. I’m sure you have better things to do than hover and worry about my soup. Scurry will keep me company,” he said with a nod at the cat perched on the corner of the desk.
