To Nelson’s relief, Nox looked infinitely better when he strode into the study an hour later, dressed in an oversized black sweater, distressed jeans, and black Converse. He was carrying one of the townhouse’s newest residents, a black male kitten named Dubh?1. Both were greeted with cheers and tearful hugs from Everly, Niall, and Tighe?2.
“I’m sorry we couldn’t be there to help,” Tighe said but Nox waved it off, handing him the kitten.
“You’re here now and I’mfine.” He looked around to make sure that everyone heard him.
Just about everyone was there, except Ingrid and the girls. They were recovering at home, maintaining their independence from the rest of the team and the wider battle against Dùbhghlas. That wasn’t at all surprising. The valkyrie weren’t loyal to a single deity but served the gods of war. It helped that Clancy was on their side but Ingrid and their daughters wouldn’t have intervened on Nox’s behalf if the gods hadn’t favored him. Both Nox and Nelson knew better than to take that for granted.
“Last night was rough but we’re still standing,” Nox said as he gestured around him.
No thanks to me.
While Nelson understood that he contributed in important ways, he couldn’t help feeling like he’d been more of a liability at Coudersport.
Nox must have sensed Nelson’s disappointment. “Don’t do that,” he said softly, just to Nelson before addressing the room. “We pulled together at the cabin and you all dropped everything when you heard I needed help. Thank you.” He nodded at the demon glaring in the corner. Nelson didn’t know if it was all the warding and white magick or his natural disdain for Nox, but Smoakdid notlook pleased to be there.
“Don’t even think of thanking me. Niall made me do it and he’s making me stay for this,” he said with a dismissive swat.
Niall smiled sunnily from the sofa. Dubh’s sister, Scurry, was curled up on Niall’s lap and purring loudly. “I barely had to ask this time,” Niall said.
“What was the point of arguing?” Smoak returned, making Nox chuckle.
“Very wise.” He offered everyone a sheepish wince. “I haven’t been acting very wise lately. I’m the happiest I’ve ever been because you’re all so happy. I don’t want to doanythingthat will change that and I don’t want to lose any of you. Including Smoak.”
“Fuck off with that,” Smoak said and rolled his eyes.
“I will not.” Nox winked at Smoak before a frown creased his brow. “I haven’t had very much time to figure out what I’m supposed to do or how to do…god things. I know I’m not ready but I can’t put off this fight with Dùbhghlas much longer.”
Smoak let out a long, suffering groan from the corner. “Justbe a fucking god.Dùbhghlas sold his soul and turned himself into a demon so he can do all the things that you can do. He’s tortured himself and done unspeakable acts but all you have to do is turn it on. Stop suppressing what is already there.”
“It’s not that simple!” Nox said, incredulous.
“Sure it is. You used to need a spiritual kick, either with Nelson’s d?—”
Nelson shook his head. “Nope. That’s none of your business.”
“Agreed,” Nox said, wagging a finger at Smoak. “Some things are just for me to know and there are things you wouldn’t want us to find out about, I’m sure,” he added with a knowing lift of his brows.
Smoak gagged. “Congratulations, you’ve managed to make paganism prudish and boring. But my point remains: you don’t need a boot camp or a fucking crash course because You. Are. A. God.You set your bed on fire when you were a child and you simply decided to catch lightning the first time you saw a kraken.”
“I’m sorry. He didwhat?” Nelson interrupted but Nox was suddenly interested in the ceiling and no one else would make eye contact with him.
Smoak smothered an amused snort and waved it off, advancing on Nox. “No one had to teach you those things because they were already inside of you. Why?” he asked and cupped his ear but he didn’t wait for anyone to answer. “That’s right! Because YOU’RE A MOTHERFUCKING GOD.Stop letting Dùbhghlas run the game when you could just snap your fingers and vaporize him.”
“No.” Nox leaned back, shaking his head. “I don’t think I could—I wouldn’t—but there would still be consequences and I’m not smart enough to make those kinds of decisions. I might be a god but I’m also a man who’s been here for less than thirty years. That’snothing! How am I supposed to know what’s right for the rest of the world?” He threw his hands up and they were shaking as Nox laughed.
“It’s a terrible burden,” Merlin agreed sadly. “That is why you have me, and Clancy, and our brave, wise Nelson.”
“And you have us now!” Everly said as he poured himself a cup of tea at the sideboard. “I’m new too, but look at how much you’ve already taught me!” he boasted and Bryn offered Nox an apologetic grimace.
“I had my doubts at first and I might have been rooting against you but you’ve made a believer out of me.”
“I hadn’t noticed,” Nox replied with a wink, then smiled warmly at Everly. “Thanks, buddy. That means a lot.”
“Do you think Dùbhghlas was there, that he was watching?” Everly asked, lowering onto the sofa between Arawn and Bryn. Fletcher was sitting on the armrest next to Arawn.
Nelson nodded. “I think that’s a safe assumption,” he said and Clancy grunted in agreement.
“If I had to guess, I’d say the whole thing was staged so that Dùbhghlas would have a front row seat. He knew Nox would be in an isolated place without any hellhounds or Everly to protect him. What better way to assess Nox and see how far he’s progressed as a fledgling god?”
