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She smiled and nodded, and when she glanced over at me and saw that I watched her, I saw her cheeks turn pink. I gave her a smile. I liked her. Not just because she seemed genuine and sweet, but because she loved my father and made him happy. And how could that make me mad?
“You’re okay with us heading out?”
I was surprised my father seemed to be looking for my approval on it. But then again, this was probably a little strange for him as well. He hadn’t been in a relationship in years, not any that I knew about anyway.
Matthew’s hand was still on my thigh, but there was nothing sexual about it. It was a reassuring touch.
I shrugged. “I’m absolutely fine with it all,” I said honestly. My father exhaled and I could see that he’d been holding his breath, probably so stressed and worried about tonight that he’d been beside himself.
I couldn’t blame him. It was one of the reasons I hadn’t told him about Matthew yet. Although my situation was a lot different than my father’s, I hoped that when the truth came to light, he would be understanding and accepting, or at least could work up to that.
I knew at first all hell would probably break loose.
An hour had passed, my father and Cora had gone, and Matthew and I had cleaned up. The two of us now sat on the couch with the TV volume almost too low to hear anything, and my body pressed against his. It was dangerous being this close under my father’s roof, what with him able to come home at any moment, but he’d probably be out for a couple of hours, and I wanted this small moment where Matthew and I could just be … us.
He had his arm around my shoulder, his fingers lightly tracing my skin. I felt drowsy, could fall asleep this way. I wanted to.
As if he read my mind, or I’d spoken those words aloud, he shifted slightly so he could grab the blanket off the back of the couch and put it over my legs and waist. I smiled but he couldn’t see me. I snuggled in closer to him and closed my eyes.
The feeling of Matthew’s chest steadily rising and falling as he breathed lulled me to sleep.
And the one thing that kept playing through my mind was how I wished we could stay like this forever, where there was no judgment, no worries.
Where it was just two people living their lives.
21
Matthew
I should have let her study, concentrate on her work, but all I could do was stare at her. For the last week since Stephan had been home, trying to keep my distance from Ivy, trying not to be a bastard and have her in every way imaginable while my brother was home, was harder than fucking hell.
She was my weakness, the only thing I’d ever wanted fully, selfishly. I couldn’t count how many times I’d wanted to just pull my brother to the side and come clean, to be honest. Lying to him, hiding this, felt—was—wrong on every level.
My arousal took a back seat as a seriousness filled me.
“We need to tell him,” I said and she glanced up.
“I know,” Ivy said right away and leaned back, pushing her book in front of her and exhaling. “We’ve needed to tell him for the past week.”
I lifted a hand and rubbed it over my jaw. “Tonight,” I said and she nodded. I was done hiding this, going behind his back. I wanted Stephan to know Ivy was mine and I wouldn’t step back, no matter what. I expected fallout, but hell, anything worth fighting for didn’t come easy.
I stared out at the gazebo, thought about when Ivy had come out there … at the memory of what she’d done as she sunk to her knees in front of me.
And just like that I was hard.
I looked over at her, could see she was staring at the gazebo as well, and this low growl left me at the knowledge that she was thinking about that moment too.
“I’m always so fucking hungry for you.” I leaned forward. “So. Fucking. Hungry.”
She let out a little gasp and I found all self-control leaving me.
The only thing I wanted, saw, felt, in that moment was Ivy. I wanted her, wanted to claim her, put my mark on her … in that very moment.
I was out of my chair and had her in my arms seconds later. With my hand on her nape, I moved us backward until the wall stopped our retreat.
Mine.
I dipped my gaze down to her lips and didn’t stop myself from taking her mouth in a deep, penetrating kiss, fucking her like I had between her legs with my mouth and cock.
