Page 82 of More Than Friends

I love that she doesn’t move. In fact, her legs stay wrapped around me, and her fingers absentmindedly play with the hair at the back of my neck as we both regain our footing.

“That was…” she pants, her chest heaving underneath mine. Her room smells like sweat and sex, and it turns me on again, even though I just came.

“Everything,” I finish for her, lifting my head just enough to be able to look her in the eye.

She pulls her bottom lip between her teeth before giving me a smile. “Yes. Everything.” Her gaze softens as she continues to play with my hair, and it’s at the tip of my tongue to tell her that I’ve fallen for her. I’ll be anything she wants me to be, but I don’t want to just be her friend. I want to be more; I’m just too fucking scared of being rejected by her to tell her that.

What if I confess how I feel and I lose her completely? I can’t do that. I need her. Ava needs her. So I force myself to keep the words to myself, no matter how much I want to say them out loud.

I never knew if I’d be able to have her like this. I buried the feelings and pretended it was fun to flirt with her, but that it was nothing more. I thought that’d work, but I could only pretend for so long.

From the moment I first saw Charlotte, she captured my attention and has kept it ever since. Little by little, I was giving her my heart without even realizing I was doing so. Nothing in my life used to make sense. It was like a puzzle where I had allthe pieces but had no idea how to put them together. But now, the pieces fit together perfectly. I know exactly how I feel—how I’ve always kind of felt about her deep down —and it all makes sense.

I’ve fallen for my best friend. Having her like this was the final piece to finally admit to myself that she owns my heart.

I’m hers.

Now, all I have to do is muster up the courage to ask her if that’s something she’d ever even want.

“Tell me a secret.” Charlotte’s words break me from my thoughts of her.

Her words catch me off guard. I open my mouth, not knowing how to even respond. If I were brave, I’d tell her exactly what I was thinking, but for the first time in my life, I’m not confident. I’m not able to say exactly what’s on my mind. I care about something enough that I can get hurt, and instead of allowing myself to be vulnerable, I rack my mind for something else I can say instead.

Something safer.

I force a smile, wishing I could tell her what I really want to say. Maybe another time, I’ll be brave enough. I just need more time to figure out where her head’s at before I put my own heart on the line. I push the wet pieces of hair from her face, my chest aching at just how beautiful she is.

“You want a secret?” I ask, my voice hoarse.

She nods, her fingers still absentmindedly playing with my hair.

I lean in to softly kiss her for a moment to buy myself time. So many different things run through my mind regarding what I could tell her, but I still settle on something that seems safe. I pull away as I let my mouth turn into a smirk. “My secret is that I’m considering hiding your toy from you so next time you get dirty thoughts about me, you just come to me instead.”

It isn’t the most vulnerable thing I could say to her, but it’s a way for me to test the waters. I want to know if she thinks this is a one-time thing or if she wants this to happen again as badly as I do.

“Is that an invitation?”

My chest loosens ever so slightly at her question. “Yes. An invitation. A demand. However you want to look at it, I want you to come straight to me next time.”

“What if I tell you that I think about you like that far more often than you think? You might get sick of me wanting you.”

My jaw clenches for a moment. I fight the urge to throw a question right back at her:What if I tell you that I’ve fallen in love with you and it pretty much feels like, besides my daughter, you’re the only thing I think about?

I keep that question to myself. For right now, it’s enough to know that at least she’s open to this happening again between us. Now that I’ve had her, it’ll never be enough.

“Oh, Char,” I begin, peppering kisses against her forehead. “Listen to me when I say this, sweetheart. I’ll never get sick of you wanting me. You got that?” I bring my gaze to hers, loving that despite already having a flush to her cheeks because of the way we fucked each other, she still blushes at my words.

“Got it,” she whispers. And before I can do something crazy like tell her I’m in love with her, I kiss her, hoping that maybe another night, I’ll have the nerve to tell her my biggest secret…the one about being head over heels in love with my best friend.

FORTY-SIX

CHARLOTTE

I wakeup to Jude’s warm body pressed against mine. His arm is draped across my middle, and his large hand is splayed out across my stomach.

I don’t think I’ve ever slept so well.

When we were sleeping, at least.