And immediately set the bottle down on the table like it burned him.
“I didn’t drink,” he said quickly. His voice cracked. “I wanted to. Bad. But I thought about you. About him kicking. And I couldn’t.”
I stepped into the room slowly. My hands trembled as I picked up the bottle, walked to the sink, and poured it out. The smell of whiskey filled the air as amber liquid spiraled down the drain.
“Thank you for stopping,” I said quietly.
He grabbed my waist and pulled me onto his lap. Wrapped his arms around me so tightly I could feel his heartbeat racing through his chest.
“I’m terrified I’ll fail you,” he whispered into my hair.
“Then don’t,” I said.
It came out stronger than I felt.
Eli overheard part of it.
I didn’t realize until later, when he stood awkwardly in the kitchen doorway while I wiped silent tears from my face.
“Cal’s trying,” he said matter-of-factly.
I looked up.
“Like when I try new foods,” he added. “It’s gross and scary but I keep going anyway.”
My throat closed.
He stepped forward and hugged me. Awkward. Tight. Rare.
I broke quietly into his shoulder.
That night, Cal spooned behind me in bed. His hand rested over my bump like it naturally belonged there.
“I told the therapist about you today,” he murmured.
“What did she say?” I whispered.
“That it starts with showing up,” he said. “Every day. Even when I don’t feel it.”
I turned slowly and kissed him. Soft. Slow. Careful.
He kissed back like he was memorizing it.
He’s not fixed, I thought as I settled back into his arms.
But he’s fighting.
And for the first time…
I think I might stay long enough to watch him win.
Chapter 30
Hadley
The morning of the baby shower started with sunlight spilling through the massive glass windows of Cal’s mansion, flooding the house in a warm gold glow that almost felt too cheerful for how tight my chest felt. Outside, the backyard looked like it had been ripped straight out of a celebrity magazine spread.
White silk tents floated in the breeze, draped with delicate ribbons in soft pink and powder blue since we still hadn’t found out the baby’s gender. Crystal vases overflowed with pastel roses and peonies, their scent mixing with fresh-cut grass and jasmine from Eleanor’s garden.
