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Plus, someone had to make sure the Badlands stayed in order––that someone being him. There had to be something left to keep.
“I get it.” I trailed a finger across his jawline.
“And there’s a gathering tonight. I wanted to give you a heads-up.”
“A gathering? Oh, fuck that!” I jumped off his lap and glared down at him. “You’re not doing that freaky goat shit with someone else. You can just cut off your dick right now if you expect me to be okay with that.”
His mouth twitched, giving away the fact that he was trying to hold back a smile.
“I would never let anyone touch my dick but you, Cali. That was an initiation; I won’t be claiming any other woman like that in this lifetime. This is just a gathering because I’ve been gone so long. I need to update them on what’s happening and let them see your face.”
“Oh.” What else could I say? I was beginning to see this whole devil/king thing wasn’t a role or him playing a character; it was real life, our reality. I could accept it—no, I did accept it. I would proudly stand by his side like the queen I was.
“How are you handling everything?” he asked.
“Honestly, I don’t know.” I shrugged.
I hadn’t given myself a chance to analyze what anything he’d said earlier meant. “I don’t consider either of those men my father. One used me, and the other left me. I’m more concerned about what was done to you.”
He looked up at the ceiling for a minute and then nodded to himself. “Sit down, Cali. I need to tell you something you should’ve known a long time ago.”
CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE
There was a ton of shit I would never tell Cali.
But then there were things I figured I’d been wrong about her knowing that maybe she should.
I told her Brock was her dad because I didn’t want her thinking she’d been getting fucked by her brother.
She looked at me, her blue eyes never shying from my onyx ones. There was a slight frown on her face, and I hadn’t even started yet.
I hadn’t the slightest fucking clue where her mind was.
Cali’s brain operated on its own wavelength; sometimes, it was damn near impossible to know what shit her head had spinning around in it.
Cobra and I had gone over what I should and shouldn’t tell her on the drive back from Jericho. That was the only reason I’d had her ride with Grimm. I wasn’t a ‘give space’ type of person. She could be as mad as she fucking wanted right beside me.
Grimm knew his baby sister was a whole different kind of fucked up than he and I were, but just like our father, he trusted me to take care of her and tell her what I thought she could deal with.
It was Cobra who miraculously wound up being the voice of reason. He pointed out how open-minded she was, how she didn’t judge anyone, how she could walk in a room with two people that destroyed her innocence and remain calm and outwardly collected.
She was so fucking strong.
I knew she could handle the parts of my past I was about to share with her. I walked to the window and rolled my neck.
“Time…it doesn’t change shit. No matter how many years go by, I still remember it like it was yesterday. My mom was David’s third wife. I was never close with him. He thought my mom had an affair because I didn’t have his eyes.
“Things were shitty but about as bearable as they could be in The Order. Then, your mom came along, and David got fucking obsessed. He fucked her on the side. I was young, but I can remember my mom crying a lot. It wasn’t until I got older that I pieced some of this together.
“Your mom got pregnant. David thought it was his. He found out it belonged to the man who was supposed to be his best friend—Brock. I think that’s when he fucking snapped.
“He had you removed from your mother. That same night, he put me in the Shiloh. I was five. The scars are just remnants of my time spent there.
I was allowed out once a month. Other than that, I was fed there, slept there, and spent my time in solitude. Men came to see me—a few women, too.”
I glanced over my shoulder and saw her hanging onto my every word.
“My mother gave me my tactical knife. I was ten by this time. A week later, in the middle of the night, I was taken from the Shiloh and brought into a room.
