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“What? No…you two were together at the house.”
“Nah, babe, not in that way. We messed around before you left and she…uh, gave me head twice in the two days after you left. but I never fuckin touched her after that. Now don’t get me wrong, Katya is gorgeous, but she could never hold a candle to you, Blue.”
I shook my head, unable to believe what he was telling me. “I…I don’t even know what to say right now.”
“Tell me I’m a fuckin idiot for letting you go. Then tell me why you look so damn sad so I can make you happy.”
“I don’t understand. If you had her, what do you want with me?”
“Blue, it was always going to be you. I just had my head to far up my own ass to know it.
“I knew the second I saw you in that hospital that you were different. I was tryna set you free.
“If you’d stayed, I’d have trapped you in hell with me. Thought you deserved more than I could ever give you.”
His words cut deep. It wasn’t just the honesty in them. It was him sitting there telling me he thought he wasn’t good enough for me. I wanted to scream at him that yes, he was a fucking idiot for that logic alone, but I knew I’d never reach him that way.
“So you and her aren’t….?” I asked instead.
“I may do a lot of stupid shit, but I know better than to fuck the friend of the woman I want.”
He wanted me? My stomach somersaulted.
I pulled my lower lip between my teeth and focused on the area rug. Why was all of this just now coming to light?
“I’m glad we cleared that up. But where does that place us now? You understand I’ve been sleeping with another man almost every night the last few weeks?
“And we have to talk. I can’t just jump from one man to another. I don’t know where to start with all this.”
His throat clearing had me glancing back over at him.
“Are you always this trusting?” he asked, looking at me.
“What?”
“I asked you if you’re always this trusting.”
“What does that have to do with anything I just said?”
“Just answer the question.”
Confused, I searched his face for a minute to see if he was joking before I replied.
“I’m never this trusting. You’re just special.”
Something between a cough and a laugh slipped from his throat. “Been called a lot of things, babe. Special has never made the list. I think you might be alone on that one.”
“That’s cool with me.” I shrugged and gave him a small smile, slowly starting to relax again.
His eyes dropped to my lips and he shook his head. “Too fuckin sweet,” he muttered.
“If you can think I’m sweet, I can think you’re special.”
“I suppose that’s fair, but I know you’re not that naïve, Blue. I’m a fucked up person. I’m not ashamed to admit that, and have never tried to hide it.”
“We’re all a little fucked up, Cobra. It’s not a competition.”
“And here I was going for a gold medal.”
