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“I’ll come home,” he said. “But things are going to change.”
…
Marianna spent the next few days on pins and needles. When Nico finally returned, she’d breathed a sigh of relief knowing he was safe. But it became clear that no conversation would be entered into until the results of the test arrived. He’d strode past her, taking only a second to make eye contact before he’d locked himself away in his office, leaving her to stew in her worries. Alone. Two days later, Jules was set to return home to Australia.
“I’m going to miss you,” Marianna said as she sat on the guest bed, watching him pack.
Jules looked up, his light eyes narrowed in concern. “You know you can call me any time. Doesn’t matter if it’s the middle of the night.”
“Thank you.” She pushed up off the bed and wrapped her arms around him. “I need a friend at the moment.”
“I’m going to regret not telling you how I felt for the rest of my life.” He pressed a cheek to her forehead. “I wish it was my baby. Then everything would be so much easier.”
Marianna held her breath, squeezing her eyes shut as Jules cradled her in his arms. Breaking down now wouldn’t solve anything. She had to be strong.
They had deep feelings because of their shared history, because they’d been through tough times together, because they knew one another. It was rooted in friendship. But it lacked the spark and burn of how Nico made her feel. When Jules looked at her it was like being wrapped in a fuzzy blanket. When Nico looked at her it was like being shocked with 110 volts.
And for a woman who’d never had much excitement in her life, she wanted the spark and the burn, rather than a lukewarm simmer. Against every bit of logic, she wanted Nico. Because as much as she loved Jules, if she was being truthful to herself, she wanted a different kind of love. She wanted that all-consuming passion from the night Nico had taken her into his bed, she wanted the excitement she felt exploring the ocean with him, she wanted the man who’d held her hand, silent and strong, as she’d taken a leap.
She wanted Nico. For real. Forever.
And what happens next time he throws a fit because he doesn’t like something?
She knew he had a lot of past hurts to work through. That his reaction wasn’t solely due to her…but that didn’t change the fact that she was the one who had to sit and worry about him. How would she do that with a baby in her arms?
“Please come back with me,” Jules whispered into her hair.
“I can’t. This is where I belong.” She swallowed. “It’s…where I want to be.”
Admitting that aloud was terrifying because it made no sense. Her husband had shut her out. He’d abandoned her for days on end without communication. But she knew he was hurting because he felt something for her. After all, if he didn’t care then why would he have reacted in such a way?
There was something worth fighting for.
And dammit, she was sick of living a sheltered life. Since she was a little girl, she’d been caged in Bubble Wrap. Her brothers had meant well, but they’d denied her important life experiences. And she’d allowed it to happen.
No more. She was going to take charge of her life. She would face Nico and tell him how she felt, that she wasn’t happy to be some ghost who haunted his house. She wasn’t happy to be someone he avoided. He would notice her, and they would live together as partners. Anything less and she would be setting a bad example for her child.
And it meant taking the job teaching English and making a life for herself in Corfu. Whatever happened, she would not run back to Australia and expect her family to clean up her mess.
“Doing the right thing for the baby should mean putting myself first,” she admitted. “I don’t want to be the one to show them what it means to settle. I’m going to tell him I want to have a go at a real marriage.”
“What if he doesn’t agree?” Jules asked. “Will you come home then?”
She shook her head. “No. I won’t.”
…
The time to face Nico came only a day later. Each afternoon, when the mail had been delivered, Marianna had rushed outside to rifle through the envelopes. Today was the day.
She’d woken to find the porcelain cat back in its place beside her bed. Nico had slept on the couch in his office every night since he’d come home, but somehow the cat had been returned to its rightful place. Yet again.
Could she take that as a sign of hope?
She sat in Nico’s office, the cat on his desk in front of her—for moral support, of course—and turned the white business-sized envelope over in her hands. The green logo of the pathology clinic was printed in one corner, and the neatly typed address had both her and Nico’s names above it.
But she wasn’t going to open it. And she would ask him to do the same.
This was the test he needed to pass. If they were going to have any chance at all to survive the challenges of raising a baby together, then he needed to make the decision to trust her. After all, she’d done everything he asked—she’d signed the prenup and taken the test. Actions would always speak louder than words. She’d proven herself trustworthy. If that wasn’t enough…then maybe she was wrong, and there wasn’t anything worth fighting for.
