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Nothing could have prepared me for the sight of myself in the mirror, though.
“Holy fuck.”
The bags underneath my eyes were fierce. The soft red marks around my throat reminded me of more things that happened last night. Things I hadn’t remembered until I looked at the marks on my body. The scratch marks. The bruises. The way that fucking thing on my face held my nose upright.
“I can’t wear this shit to school.”
I tried taking it off, but it felt like it was plastered to my nose. The bruises on my cheekbones made me angry. The light black and blue marks that peppered my ribcage made my blood boil. I turned my back to the image of myself and decided to suffer through a shower. I knew it would hurt, water battering against my abused body. But I stunk. I smelled of rain water, sweat, and hopelessness.
And if the plan was to do research today, I needed my wits about me.
I got into the shower and groaned all the way through it. Every droplet hurt. It felt like my body had gone into overdrive, like my nerve endings were exposed. I probably should’ve gone to the hospital. But I didn’t want to be in the same facility as my father.
When the hell was he coming home anyway?
I slipped out of the shower and dried myself off, pressing the towel softly against my skin as I walked into my bedroom. Everything felt muted. It almost felt like I wasn’t piloting my own body. Not really, anyway. I felt out of place. Out of time. Alert, but not really there.
Until a knock came at my door.
“Clint?”
Cecilia’s voice caused me to pause. I quickly wrapped the towel around my waist before I reached for the door. I closed my eyes, drawing in a deep breath. Because I knew seeing me like this would throw her for a loop.
Then I opened the door.
She gasped. “Clint, you need a doctor.”
I opened my eyes. “I’m fine.”
“Your ribs. You—come with me. Come on. I’ll get you somewhere.”
“Cecilia.”
“Your nose doesn’t look much better, either. We need to schedule surgery.”
“Cecilia.”
“Come with me. You can skip school and—”
I snipped at her, “Cecilia.”
She paused. “Yes?”
I sighed. “You shouldn’t be here when my father gets home from the hospital. Whenever that is. It won’t be safe for you. Not after you calling the paramedics and having him hauled off last night.”
“I’m not concerned about that right now. I’m concerned about you. We need to go get you checked out. For all we know, your father’s knocked something loose or busted stitches somewhere we don’t know about.”
“I’m fine. It’s all topical.”
“And how do you know that?”
I snickered. “If I were bleeding internally, I’d technically already be dead.”
She stared at me and I took her in. Really, truly took her in. The color of her eyes that had slowly faded. The disheveled nature of her hair as she piled it at the crown of her head. The bags under her eyes were heavier than I’d ever seen them. And, without makeup, she looked ten years older. She had crows’ feet at the corners of her eyes. Her lips were downturned, causing her entire face to sag. Her shoulders were hunched. She favored her left side.
I nodded slowly. “Didn’t get much sleep, either?”
She brushed off my question. “I won’t take you to the hospital your father’s at, but you have to see someone.”
