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“You didn’t. If anyone took advantage . . . I did. I shouldn’t have come on to you like that,” she said, shaking her head. “Especially not like that.”
“It’s not that I didn’t like what we did.” He had a feeling he’d remember the way Georgia’s hands moved over her body for a long time. And every time the image popped in his head, he’d be left wanting.
She studied her coffee. “It was too wild. Just too much.”
“No.” His voice was firm, but in the back of his mind he knew she wasn’t talking about the kink factor. He had a feeling last night had overwhelmed her. Add that to the list of reasons he couldn’t go there again. Still, he refused to let Georgia blame herself. “Hell, if the circumstances were different, I’d be on my knees begging for a repeat.”
She raised a single eyebrow. Back when they were growing up, he’d always envied her ability to give a look that basically called bullshit without saying a word.
“I’m serious, Georgia.”
She cocked her head to one side and studied him as if she could read his mind. Maybe after all these years, she could. “I always figured you were straightlaced.”
“I am. But not when it comes to you. I like you, Georgia. And I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t attracted to you. But none of that changes the fact last night was a one-time thing.”
She nodded. “It was. I just needed . . . something.”
“OK then.” He’d said what he had to say. Hell, he’d said more. He hadn’t planned on revealing he was attracted to her. Still, they were on the same page.
But there was one question he was dying to ask. After his conversation with Liam this morning, he had to know.
Eric reached across the table and took her hand. The feel of her skin, warmed from her coffee mug, made him ache with a bone-deep need to touch her. He’d held her hand before. But after seeing all the places he couldn’t go, this simple skin-to-skin contact drove him wild.
“Why me, Georgia?” he said quietly. “After all these years, knowing what’s between us, why me?”
GEORGIA HAD BEEN living in a constant state of need for his touch. And now that he held her hand with his calloused fingers, made rough by long hours of physical work, she was suddenly thrust back to that exposed place. Her emotions quickly rose to the surface while her body silently begged for him to stroke her everywhere, not stopping until she came on his kitchen table.
She withdrew her hand and looked away.
“Why’d you come to my room?” he pressed.
She couldn’t tell him she’d wanted him forever. If last night had made her feel emotionally weak, saying those words, admitting she had fantasized about him for years, would be like painting a bull’s-eye on her heart. Biting her lip, she hesitated, searching for an explanation. “It’s been a long time for me. For sex, I mean. I’ve had orgasms . . .” God, she was making a mess of this. “But not like that.”
“Proximity. You needed a rush, and I was there. I get it.” He sat back in his chair. “I guess it is safer than jumping out of planes.”
No, not by a long shot, but she kept her mouth shut.
“But I can’t be your next big rush,” he added.
“I know,” she said, unable to hide the frustration in her voice. “We’re clear on that.”
He reached for the bacon. “So what’s next on your adrenaline hit list?”
Georgia blinked. Did he really think it was that easy? That she had a list of things to check off to prove she was alive and worthy of moving on with her life? That if she made it to the end she’d be fine after all she’d seen?
“It’s not like that,” she said.
He crossed his arms in front of his chest. “Then why are you doing this? Seeking out one big hit of excitement after another?”
“You don’t know what I saw.”
“Tell me,” he demanded.
She shook her head. No. Getting through this, moving forward, that was on her. She hadn’t told anyone—not her brother, not the few remaining girlfriends she’d kept in touch with, or the military shrink—about what it was like to watch her fellow soldiers lose their lives. She couldn’t. No one else could understand.
“Georgia,” he said, “tell me. Please.”
Georgia pressed her lips together. She didn’t have the words. Not yet. Maybe she never would.
